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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Cokeaholic Started my first job, anxious out of my mind
  • replies: 3

Hello! I'm a forum newbie, so bear with me haha. So I make things clear, I'm 20 and have been dealing with clinical anxiety and autism my entire life. I started my first job at a small fish and chips store three months ago, working 2 shifts a week, 3... View more

Hello! I'm a forum newbie, so bear with me haha. So I make things clear, I'm 20 and have been dealing with clinical anxiety and autism my entire life. I started my first job at a small fish and chips store three months ago, working 2 shifts a week, 3 hours each. I got this job through a friend referral, which meant I skipped the job interview. This job has been causing a lot of anxiety for me however, despite the leniency from my manager and my co-workers, and most customers being very friendly people. All the time, I worry that I'll do something wrong, like mess up packing an order or mishear a customer's order. I haven't gone near a single phone order due to this. The messing of packing an order has happened once, which has resulted me in getting a temporary panic attack, leaving me out of commission for 30mins. My manager had no idea how to handle it, since he had never worked with someone with clinical anxiety. The anxiety only ramps up the closer it gets to time for me to leave for work, and it's gotten to the point where I had to lie to skip work one time because I was too frozen in my own anxiety to move. Despite the work itself being relatively easy-going, calm with not a lot of customers, my brain thinks otherwise. It's also caused me to dip somewhat in my schoolwork, just because I can't stop worrying about work. It doesn't also help much that miscommunication is a thing that happens very frequently with my manager and coworkers, as they are not from an English-native background. I feel like I annoy my manager every time I ask him to repeat something to me. I have raised this issue to be more direct to me to him, but I don't think that got through clearly. My last issue is the pay. Although I know I'm doing this for the experience, I am being heavily underpaid by casual working standards for an adult, so my main source of income is from my youth allowance. I'm too scared to raise it to my manager for fear of something worse happening. My job agency said that I should rely from my youth allowance instead until I get a full-time job, because my workplace can get into huge legal trouble for this. This has been plaguing me ever since I started working. Any help would be appreciated, whether I should continue working, change jobs, quit entirely or find ways to cope around this. I have never taken medication for my anxiety before, and have been visiting a psychologist. Thanks for reading!

Winkpink13 My mental health is too much and I want to drop out of year 12!
  • replies: 2

Hi, this is my first ever post on this forum! Let’s just say I am in a dark place, I have been dealing with GAD for years now and recently the depression side of things had gotten the better of me. I’ve been constantly needing distractions, I hate th... View more

Hi, this is my first ever post on this forum! Let’s just say I am in a dark place, I have been dealing with GAD for years now and recently the depression side of things had gotten the better of me. I’ve been constantly needing distractions, I hate that I need distractions cause I am a person who wants more than anything to be completely happy and satisfied with themselves, and who doesn’t need anything/anybody else. Not to mention I have very recently been through a break up type scenario. This person was not only a distraction, but someone who I felt made even my darkest days worth fighting for. I hated that this person was sometimes the only thing getting me through but it was the truth. We ended because he wasn’t ready for any sort of commitment, which hurts even more because there was nothing wrong with us! We were so close, and the thought of him and I working out wasn’t a recent one, we have been mates for ages now! He liked me as much as I liked him so he is just as hurt... which makes it 10x worse. Anyway, throughout the past few years I have had many days off school as I have had to completely focus on myself... I truly believe I am my number 1 priority. Recently, school has been really hard for me. I understand I am in year 12, I get amazing grades, but I don’t think school is for me anymore. I want to do something that I enjoy and that I want to spend my days doing, but I am so scared I would regret dropping out of year 12. My end goal in life is to be happy with my chosen career, my favourite saying is that “if you love your job, you’ll never work a day in your life.” I am most worried that not completing my year 12 is going to stop me from getting my dream job in the long run (I don’t know what my dream job is yet!) I’m so stuck! What do I do? I feel like I can’t go on with this year, I am at extreme breaking points and most days I physically and mentally can not go to school, which is becoming a problem. I feel like my expectations in life are achievable and I know not every day is going to be happy, but I want a change! I’ve always wondered what life would be like if I took a different route to the ‘normal’, I know school isn’t for everyone, is it for me? Help!

Bonnie1122 What to do?
  • replies: 4

I have am being kicked out of my parents home for disturbing the peace my mum has made. I have no car, not much money and nowhere to really go. I am a senior senior student at school still and freaking out about all this being so close to EST's. Anyo... View more

I have am being kicked out of my parents home for disturbing the peace my mum has made. I have no car, not much money and nowhere to really go. I am a senior senior student at school still and freaking out about all this being so close to EST's. Anyone have advice?

Pearl95 How do I want to be here again
  • replies: 2

I don't even know how to start, I guess for the most part I feel like a burden. I feel like I make everyone miserable, that I am the reason why everything goes wrong. I feel like a shit mum, wife, friend, sister, aunty. I hate myself so much and I fe... View more

I don't even know how to start, I guess for the most part I feel like a burden. I feel like I make everyone miserable, that I am the reason why everything goes wrong. I feel like a shit mum, wife, friend, sister, aunty. I hate myself so much and I feel like my husband does to. He doesn't treat me great sometimes, but he's been trying so hard lately and I feel like I've let him down. I feel like everyone would be better if I wasn't here and it scares me. I don't know what to do anymore, I know I'm getting worse. I can see myself getting worse. I think this stuff more often than not now and I just don't know what to do. My Dr thinks I have anxiety and pnd but nothing has been diagnosed yet. Sorry if I make no sense, I don't know what I'm asking. I think I'm just trying to comprehend what's happening to be because I just don't understand

Jo22 Anxious about university
  • replies: 2

I have only just signed up these forums so not really sure what I am doing but I really need some advice. I started university two weeks ago and I am finding it really hard to have the motivation to do anything. I am too scared to leave my room (I am... View more

I have only just signed up these forums so not really sure what I am doing but I really need some advice. I started university two weeks ago and I am finding it really hard to have the motivation to do anything. I am too scared to leave my room (I am staying in a residential college) so I have missed some lectures and keep missing meals. I went to my first tutorial today and I was late because I was too afraid to go into the room, then I couldn't take notes because I was too afraid to move. I keep having panic attacks and I'm not really sure why. I am a fairly quiet person but I have never had a problem walking to class alone but suddenly leaving my room is too much for me. I have tried talking to my mum about the situation but she just tells me to 'get over it' which doesn't really help all that much. I really don't know what to do so any advice is appreciated!

snardavellus42 New school, incredibly unmotivated
  • replies: 2

Hello, Recently, after moving to a new school, I have felt depressed and lonely. Over the past two years, I have had depression on an on/off basis. It has gotten quite bad at times. In primary school, I was horribly alone and had no friends at all, f... View more

Hello, Recently, after moving to a new school, I have felt depressed and lonely. Over the past two years, I have had depression on an on/off basis. It has gotten quite bad at times. In primary school, I was horribly alone and had no friends at all, for six years. Now that I’ve moved schools again, I feel afraid that I’ll have no friends and no support network. I moved from an IB school to a VCE one, so I find tests and lectures very frightening and intimidating and I can’t cope with the levels of homework. I don’t know how to stop procrastinating, and I can’t find motivation to because I feel that I’ll fail in everything I do anyways. I am never satisfied with what I do and I only ever see faults. No one really understands me as they think I’m ‘smart’ (I got a scholarship to my new school) but I’m really not; I’m just consistently lucky. I don’t know how to change my attitude and improve my self esteem or how to find motivation. I’m consistently tired and I have headaches often. I’m really slow and I feel like I’m on the brink of panic attacks a lot. To top it all off, every year in Term 3 I have a really bad mental breakdown. If I’m like this now, I fear that that breakdown will make m insane... it also occurs around the same time as exams (which I’ve never written before). Advice? Thanks for reading, snard

Lachy3130 A melancholic 25th
  • replies: 2

So I`m turning 25 on the 9th and have been feeling down the last few weeks as I've been looking back on my life since year 12 all the way back in 2012 and haven`t been happy about it at all. I feel like my unfinished courses, heartbreaks, and friends... View more

So I`m turning 25 on the 9th and have been feeling down the last few weeks as I've been looking back on my life since year 12 all the way back in 2012 and haven`t been happy about it at all. I feel like my unfinished courses, heartbreaks, and friendships cut short. I know that worse things have happened to me and I've had some successes too. But as i'm now back home with my family with no tertiary education or career to my name I feel like the last seven years being a total waste and that I have achieved much more in the last two years of my secondary schooling. Now I have no idea what I want to do with my life nor where to go from here apart from knowing that I want to stay alive and have a reason to more than just not wanting to hurt those I care about. That's just how I feel that's all.

Mouse11 Anxiety
  • replies: 2

Hi, My anxiety is destroying my relationship. We have been together for just over a year and it has been amazing but the last two months there has been a spike in my anxiety and I am literally ruining my relationship without being able to help it. I ... View more

Hi, My anxiety is destroying my relationship. We have been together for just over a year and it has been amazing but the last two months there has been a spike in my anxiety and I am literally ruining my relationship without being able to help it. I just started studying which I think may be triggering a bit of it due to stress. The main trigger that causes me to tip over the edge is that my boyfriend has a best friend - who until about 3 months ago was really nasty to me and my boyfriend never said anything about it - but I am constantly feeling like the second option when it comes to spending time etc... A couple of months ago I realised that my boyfriend never asks to see me any more so I stopped asking him to hang out and he didn’t ask to see me once. I am just constantly in fear that he prefers to see his friend more than me, which never used to be the case. i just helped him buy an old car which he is doing up at the moment so he never wants to hang out with me because he is always too busy working on the car, he explained to me that he wants to get it done so then we can go on a holiday with it together. But I heard him say to his dad the other day that he can’t wait to get it done so him and his friend can go on a holiday together - to the same place he told me he would take me. i was going away last Saturday and I hadn’t seen him in 3 days and he had spent every day that week with his friend. His friend was also going away on Sunday. He is a fisherman so he works every day and starts work early in the morning so we haven’t slept in the same bed together for 3 months. Last Saturday he had his first day off in 3 months, and we had plans to hang out on the Friday, when he told me he had the day off I got really excited because it meant that we would get to sleep in the same bed before I went away, but instead he told me that I would need to go home in half an hour because his friend was coming over for drinks before he went away. there are many many other examples of what have made me feel anxious and insecure. Whenever I try and speak to him about it he just tells me that I am jealous of his friend. Our relationship never used to be like this, it’s only been since his friend has got out of a relationship. I don’t know whether I am over reacting or if it’s acrtually worth getting upset over, but my anxiety has caused me to get upset and say some things that I have regretted immediately after. I just don’t know what to do

LauraFa What is happening to my boyfriend..?
  • replies: 1

Hello I’m new here and am really confused .. that’s why I thought it might be helpful asking for some advice or answers.. My partner (25) who I have been with for two years, has lately been really really down and said he doesn’t know what’s wrong wit... View more

Hello I’m new here and am really confused .. that’s why I thought it might be helpful asking for some advice or answers.. My partner (25) who I have been with for two years, has lately been really really down and said he doesn’t know what’s wrong with him and feels like he’s drifting trough life .. well then last Friday we had an argument about me saying that I don’t get what’s up with him and he’s changed and also if he really loves me - well it turned out that he was asking for a break and needs time by himself .. I was in shock and heartbroken. A few days after we talked and he cried and said he doesn’t feel like himself anymore and doesn’t even like himself, that he doesn’t know what to do in life and also needs a break to figure out if he loves me the way I do, he didn’t change his behaviour ( like I didn’t sense or felt that he wouldn’t love me at all). I’m really worried if he’s suffering a form of depression or is just going trough a stage of freaking out because he doesn’t know what to do in life. He said to me he loves me but he could only fix himself by being alone.. that he needs to start loving himself again, on the other hand he was telling me that whenever I would feel like I could text him and we might be able to catch up. Yesterday then he came to visit me after my wisdom teeth removal to check if i was okay and then I asked him again if we’re breaking up and he said no i don’t see it as a break up but we’ve no relationship, he was very emotional and I don’t know what he actually needs or wants and I feel so unable to help him.. he said to me I should focus on myself too and not wait for him in case things don’t change or he doesn’t want to be with me any longer. But still wants to keep me in his life. I had to make a big step and sent him away and said I will not contact him, but will be there once he feels the need of seeing me.. he looked kinda shocked and was crying about it but I didn’t know what to do anymore as I felt I can’t take this limbo. Theres so much more I would love to say, anyway maybe someone here dealt with something similar and can just give me some advise or their opinions. Thank you

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