vent: loss of motivation in HSC year

[Abi_555]

For the last few years I've gradually been loosing motivation to any school work, homework and I hardly study for exams. Now that I'm in year 12 and currently sitting trials, I realize how bad it has gotten.

I've been expressing to friends and family that I have lost all motivation but it's getting worse and worse and every strategy that I try to cope with this doesn't work. My lack of motivation is so overpowering that I feel like I'm just watching my life go by but I can't do anything.

I have so many things that I want to achieve, I know which uni course I want to do and I have so many goals in life but I feel so unmotivated to do anything constructive to achieve the future I want, I feel like I'm stuck in a downward spiral.

I started off highschool so well, I was getting high marks in everything but now I'm getting around 60% in all my classes (no one knows), which is a big drop and every day I get more and more anxious that I'm not going to be able to get into my uni course.

I was diagnosed with a generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder earlier this year as well and I think my anxiety is making this even worse because I'm stuck between my fear of failing and my lack of motivation.

All I want to do each day is just sleep in bed. I can't be bothered to take showers, brush my teeth, eat, go outside but at the same time everyone thinks I've got my life together.

A few years ago, I couldn't see myself living to year 12 and now that I made it to year 12, I have no academic motivation and feel like I'm ruining my future.

I don't want to let my family down but pressure from them or teachers is not enough to get me motivated like it used to. It's like I don't care anymore but I obviously still do.

I don't know what I can do to regain motivation. I've been waiting for it come back but it doesn't seem it is. I'm worried I'll be like this for years.

Has anyone had or is having a similar experience? How were you able to regain motivation?

[Pecan]

Yeah, even studying for a few minutes can snowball into longer study peroids over time.

[chadicha]

Hey Abi, as someone who sat HSC last year and lost motivation during my last few years of school I completely understand where your at. It feels like family, friends, teachers expect you to perform at the level they know your capable of, but sometimes when you go through life and are growing, facing challenges even internally, it's not possible to do so, and this is perfectly OKAY. You are a human and your so much more important than your marks and grades. You can always get into your dream course in life, in fact uni's want more students than less and if there is a will there is a way. Even though I didn't achieve the results I knew I was capable of achieving, I knew my mental health would have taken the biggest hit if I tried to make myself do really well. I burnt out and experienced such high amounts of pressure which caused chronic stress, my relationships to take a hit and series of depression. Looking back now, I wish I realised I was more important as a human and my wellbeing than anything I wanted to set out to do. And even though yes, all of these external goals are important to me, I'm not going to achieve them if I'm dragging myself to do so. Your so young and nothing you do now is gonna mess your life up, if anything a different path will get you right on track to where your meant to be. Being unmotivated sometimes doesn't mean your lousy or not good enough or failing, your so smart and amazing, it just means you need to take some time for yourself and listen to what you body's trying to tell you whether thats to focus more on your personal life, your mental, spiritual health etc. Life is so much more than expectations and pressure, its how you experience it, not what grades you get or degree you get into. Take things at your own pace. You would be much happier if you healed and become more rejuvenated rather than psyching yourself up too much just to get in now when it wouldn't make much difference to do it a year later. Even if you do have the goal to get into your dream course now, don't stress yourself too much because trust me its all going to work out perfectly in your favour. You'll look back on this time one day and wished you were easier on yourself just like I did.

And another thing, don't take life too seriously, take yourself and your health and joy seriously.

[JulieS101]

Hey, I am going through the same thing. I used to be very motivated by Covid,family issues and anxiety and depression has totally depleted any motivation I used to have. Have you applied for any early entry’s that will consider year 11 work. Your hard work whether it’s from the last or not should be validated and considered when you apply. Also the ATAR is a test of privilege that starts from kindergarten and discriminates against those with mental health issues and tricky family lives. Your mark won’t define you.

[Banksy92]

Hi Abbi,

Welcome to the forums, and thanks for sharing your story.

There is so much pressure on us in our final year of school and I think a lot of people feel overwhelmed by it all. I honestly think they put too much pressure on us to make big life decisions at such an early age. When I was in year 12 I was stressed out of my mind and felt competitive with my friends to do well. It's funny how a few years later you can look back and see it was blown out of proportion.

That being said, the way you're feeling doesn't sound good and if you have goals you want to achieve you should definitely go for it. What types of things have you been doing to try and get back on track?

You mentioned you had a diagnosis, have you been seeing anyone like a councillor or psychologist to help you manage your symptoms? This can be really helpful. It might even be worth talking to your teachers as well to try and get some special consideration for your circumstances. It's been an incredibly difficult couple of years for students with lockdowns etc. I'm sure they are open to the conversation.

Also keep in mind that even if you're experiencing a difficult time right now, know that your grades for this year will not define you or limit your options after school. There are lots of pathways to reach your goals.

Hope this helps