Social anxiety?

[wilsonnicolet]

I might have social anxiety or I might just be confused. At school or places that I'm unfamiliar with, I'm quiet and get extremely nervous when people talk to me. I'm part of a sports team, and there I'm a social butterfly.

My face gets red when people try to talk to me or I get called out in class... I might just be shy, but it really stresses me out. I'm scared to get called on

I might be depressed or I might just be confused. I don't feel emotions the way I used to feel them. I can cry, I can smile, and I can laugh, but it's not deep. I don't feel pain the way I used to. Nothing effects me or upsets me. I keep asking myself if I'd rather feel something or nothing? Because this way I don't hurt, but this way... I feel empty. I always feel empty, and I don't know how to feel whole. I try so hard to do things I love and be with people I love, but I'm constantly tired. I don't know who to talk to because my problems aren't as big... I don't want to bother anyone because I complain a lot. I want to go through a life changing experience and feel something real because I don't feel human anymore, and I'm confused. 

[CrashCoyote]

Hi wilsonnicolet,

I am guessing you are in your mid teens?

There are lots of hormonal changes that go on in teenage years and although you may be feeling different, it does not mean you are suffering a mental illness. (Of course, you could be, I do not have the training to know.)

Can I suggest you talk to your school counsellor (or year advisor etc) or your GP? Even call the 1300 number here or web chat. It is free and anonymous. Even if it is a problem, diagnosis and treatment is always the best answer. I am a dad of five and I can assure you it will not be seen as whining or complaining.

Please get back to the site if you wish, I would like to know how it goes for you.

Kind regards, John.

[Amy_G]

Hi wilsonnicolet, welcome to the beyond blue forums 🙂

I've had social anxiety for basically all of my 20 years of life, but up until recently I always thought that it was "just shyness" so I can definitely relate to what you're going through. I still find it difficult to draw the line between shyness and social anxiety, but personally I think that, if it's affecting your life and your behaviour, or it's causing significant distress, then it's more likely to be social anxiety. You say that this is really stressing you out, so I would definitely go and see a GP, or maybe a school counsellor, about this. 

I always found it helpful to read things about social anxiety that I identified with, it sort of validated me in a way? Everyone's different of course, but it might help you if you read up on it - Reach Out is a website with a lot of information on a lot of different issues that I find helpful. You can find a lot of resources at mindhealthconnect, and by exploring the beyond blue website if you haven't already. Also the Liebowitz Social Anxiety Scale is a pretty good measure of social anxiety, I found. 

I can also identify with a lot of what you said about depression. I'm currently experiencing that "empty" feeling for the first time, and when I was younger I never thought that anything I was going through was important or significant, and I didn't want to annoy anyone or embarrass myself by talking to anyone about it. But everything you've talked about here could definitely be signs of mental illness, which is absolutely important.

I would strongly advise you to talk to a counsellor or GP about these things, even if you think you might just be confused. Better to deal with it now rather than later - I didn't seek help until after I almost screwed up year 12, and seriously screwed up my uni degree, because of my depression. Deal with it now before it gets worse and ruins everything!!

Hope this can help 🙂

- Amy G