Recent Breakup/ Lonely

[Erica17]

Last night my boyfriend and I split up after 7 years because of emotional issues and others strains in our relationship recently.

I can't stop thinking about him. I've talked to friends, but we aren't as close as we used to and can't catch up very easy due to distance. I've spoken to family, but it hasn't helped. I've tried doing things, like going outside, reading etc, but almost anything I do makes me think of little things about what we shared or I just think of him anyway.

I feel so low, and just want to talk to him again. He's been my rock for such a long time. We spoke of things that we didn't really share with others.

I don't know how to cope. I'm wondering if I should go see a doctor.

[blondguy]

Hi Erica17

Thankyou for having the courage to post and good on you!

Im sorry about the delay in you getting a response. We are usually pretty quick in posting back 🙂

A GP is always a good idea as you will feel better after having a good chat and they have a lot of people that see them with the same problem. You everything to gain and nothing to lose by doing so

It doesnt matter how old we are, when a relationship falls apart it hurts like hell. I remember the pain you are going through as it has happened to me as well.....

The pain will go away....that much I do remember Erica. In the meantime do have a GP that you can have a vent to?

you are not alone here in any way

my kind thoughts

Paul

[white knight]

Hi Erica, welcome

Its been a while since you posted so I'll give it a try.

I've had four long term relationships more than 8 years each. So 3 breakups.

Each time l needed a "helping hand" by way of medication (short term), counselling or just a short chat for ideas. So l think seeing your GP is a gfreat idea and you are commended for your attitude.

Time, you cant rush it, but it can be your friend. Going on dates can help because you'll be attracting attention. Group outings too.The diversion you are doing might not be enough. Take up a sport like table tennis, badminton or bowling.

Google this

Topic: the best praise you'll ever get- beyondblue

Tony WK

[BballJ]

Hi Erica17,

As blondguy (Paul) & white knight (Tony WK) eluded too, break ups hurt like hell, especially the long ones like yours, it is the initial shock of being out of routine to a degree, emotional strains aside, you both still had a routine which involved each other and you were in that way and once it ends the loneliness sets in, very common but it just needs time and a distraction to eventually move on from. A distraction can be a new hobby, reading a book, even dating someone.

I would also recommend seeing a GP to discuss your feelings and for any guidance, a psychologist is a great way to go just to speak to someone, who doesn't know you and doesn't judge you but just helps to make sense of all the feelings and thoughts rushing through your head.

My best for you,

Jay

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Erica17,

Thanks for your post.

I'm sorry to hear of your breakup; it sounds like it's been really hard and 7 years is a very long time. I think break-ups are hard however long you've been together but I think 7 years feels like a lifetime.

I'm not sure when this happened but it's totally okay that you've been feeling this way. I think I can echo everyone else when I say break-ups are hard, and they hurt a lot. Sometimes for a while.

If you'd like to see a Doctor you definitely can. Often people think that they need to feel a certain way to see one, and that's not the case at all. My therapist said that she wishes everyone would go to therapy because they can learn so much about themselves! So no harm at all.

It sounds like you don't really have a good support group right now and I'm sorry too. I hope that we on the forums can be a bit of a support in the meantime until things start to look up for you. It's good that you're encouraging yourself to go outside and reading and I hope you keep doing that; sometimes it can help to try something new that you haven't done before. Maybe there's something that you're interested in that you've wanted to try but never had the chance?