New here. Dottie 😊

[Guest_322]

Hi,

I'm new here 😊 Little about myself is that I'm studying full-time at uni and working part-time.

Struggling...been on a roller coaster ride of emotions but mostly feeling down. Mornings have been the hardest.

And I feel lonely. I have friends and family, but for various reasons, I don't confide in most of them.

On the outside, I act like I'm coping. Inside, it just hurts.

Motivation has been a struggle lately. Have to force myself to do my uni work when all I want to do is cry.

My uni friends seem to have this impression that I'm always motivated and seem to cope. But they don't see what goes on in my head or behind closed doors. It's not that I'm always motivated and coping, but it's just that I FORCE myself to do what I need to do.

I just feel drained at the moment. And teary.

Thanks for reading.

[Guest_322]

Thanks Paul! 😊

[blondguy]

No worries Dottie and thanks for taking the time to post back too 🙂

The book that I learned how to be 'gentle' to myself is called 'Self Help for your Nerves' by Dr Claire Weekes...the title is daggy but she wrote it in plain english....and it really helped me big time when I was in my early 20's when I was having difficulty finding my way.

Its still in print and many authors use her books as a reference too! If you google Dr Claire Weekes it is a 'rash' on google.

More than happy the be here for you Dottie123

My kindest thoughts 🙂

Paulx

[Guest_322]

Hi Paul,

Thanks for the reading suggestion. I might google it. It certainly seemed to help you 😊

- Dottie

[hope_64]

Hi dotti, im trying to write a response but it's not coming out the way that i mean so I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you be kind to yourself and take care sometimes we try and fool others about how we feel because we don't really want them to know the truth, sometimes we want to believe what we are saying but when thoughts and emotions are suppressed they do eventually come to the surface and it usually comes at a personnel cost, I'm looking forward to chatting more but for now good night

[Guest_322]

Hi Hope 64,

Thanks for leaving me such a sweet message. There's some truth in your message about why we sometimes hide how we feel from the people around us.

[candis]

Hi Dottie,

I felt connected to your post, as i study and work as well and life can be a bit much some times. I just wanted to say that its so great that everyone is reaching out to you and good on you for posting & reaching out. Thats very proactive and your stronger than you give yourself credit for.

I just try to remember that things will get better when im feeling down, and that its just this way right now, not forever 🙂 keep well.

Candis

[Guest_322]

Thank you very much Candis for empathising and for the supportive message. Yeah, the juggling act can be tough sometimes.

[Cantthinkofadisplayname1]

Hi Dottie.

Boy do I know how you feel. Being required to put on a brave face and carry on with the show. Hiding weaknesses from others....giving off the illusion of strenght. It's all a bit much isn't it.

Another strange thing is the way we hide our true feelings from those closest to us....as if we fear that their opinion of us might change if we reveal the truth. Well....I guess that's where we (on the forums) come in. We know....we share...we can empathise.....and we don't judge!

Feeling drained is natural I think. It takes a lot of emotional strain to persevere against ones will. With all the hustle and bustle going on in your life I'd suggest making a bit of time for YOU. Don't be afraid to be selfish...take the time you need to relax, let go of frustrations. Just whenever you can. Doesn't have to be long....just as long as you devote a little time for yourself. I find my mindset is a little clearer afterwards.

Anyway I wish you well and as others have said "We're here for you".

[Guest_322]

Hi Can't think of a display name,

Firstly, can I just say that I love your display name? It made me smile.

That was a really lovely reply that you wrote and I appreciate your message immensely.

You phrased it nicely when you called it an "illusion of strength." Illusion= operative word 😉

I agree about the forum. Yes, it's a safe place to share- where people "get it"- and where we don't have to pretend to be okay when we're not (a far cry from many of our offline lives).

Thanks for the reminder to remember to pause and take some time out for myself. I'm known to forget to do that as I'm often all "go, go, go."

[dark_unicorn]

HI Dottie,

I was just reading your first post, and as I was reading through, I was thinking, my god this sounds like me! All through school I have never been excellent with homework...there would have been a fair few late submissions. But now (in year 9), I've found that this is getting worse. I have no motivation to do anything until I absolutely have to. For example, I am writing this at 6:30 AM before school because I'm about to finish some work due today.

The main problem for me is, I can't be bothered to do anything leading up to the due date, but suddenly the night before I get a ton of work and I hate myself for not doing it earlier!

I just can't win 😕