New here. Dottie 😊

[Guest_322]

Hi,

I'm new here 😊 Little about myself is that I'm studying full-time at uni and working part-time.

Struggling...been on a roller coaster ride of emotions but mostly feeling down. Mornings have been the hardest.

And I feel lonely. I have friends and family, but for various reasons, I don't confide in most of them.

On the outside, I act like I'm coping. Inside, it just hurts.

Motivation has been a struggle lately. Have to force myself to do my uni work when all I want to do is cry.

My uni friends seem to have this impression that I'm always motivated and seem to cope. But they don't see what goes on in my head or behind closed doors. It's not that I'm always motivated and coping, but it's just that I FORCE myself to do what I need to do.

I just feel drained at the moment. And teary.

Thanks for reading.

[james1]

Hi Dottie

I'll post a longer reply later because I'm not at home but I just wanted to let you know we're here for you. That sounds like a mountain of stress you're dealing with at the moment

Hugs

James

[Cold_Mirror]

Hi Dottie

You have a lot on your plate with full-time study and working as well. I know what you mean about looking as though you're coping well, whilst the inside is much different. I find mornings hard too when I'm depressed.

It's important to have some outlet for your real feelings. So, joining here was a very good idea. I hope that you stick around.

There is also counselling available for students at most Australian Universities. Usually it's something like 6 free sessions a year. Keep that in mind if things really get on top of you. It's worth finding out now what services are available so that you know where the help can be found if you need it.

Take good care of yourself. xx

[Guest_322]

Thank you James!!!

[Guest_322]

Thank you Cold_Mirror. I appreciate that you can empathise- makes me feel a little bit less alone. And I'll keep the uni counselling in mind! Thanks again xx

[Cold_Mirror]

Hi again, Dottie. I just want to say how moving it is that you've replied to so many newcomers with some very positive words. So lovely of you to help people feel comfortable and valued. 🙂

[james1]

Hey Dottie,

I'm so glad you're feeling a little less alone now.

I've seen some of your other posts on other threads and you seem like a really caring person so it's great to have you on board.

Just a quick background of me: I was working and studying full time as well at the beginning of the year and, while I was doing pretty well academically, the stress was clearly getting to me. Eventually, after I finished the exams, I decided it was time to re-evaluate and I'm looking to drop uni for now.

Will your uni let you drop some subjects now without any financial or academic penalty? I think it's really great that you've recognised you are under a lot of stress. You really are putting in a superhuman amount of effort and that's really impressive, but we are only human. It'd be worthwhile thinking about whether you can reduce the load this semester. Your mental health is so much more important than finishing uni faster.

It is not a failure on your part at all if you decide to drop. I honestly think it takes more willpower to reduce our workload, especially for people who have gotten used to being really under the pump.

Let us know how you go this week. I'm really thankful that you've joined us because you've already supported others on their posts, and your post here has helped me clarify my own situation.

You're a real star Dottie, I hope you can afford to give yourself a little bit of a breather.

James

[Guest_322]

Aw thank you Cold_Mirror. Your kind words made my day and brought a smile to my face.

[Guest_322]

Hi James,

It's great to hear from you again. Thank you for your encouragement and thoughtfulness- your message has given me some things to think about and I appreciate the support immensely.

I think it was great that you reassessed your situation and state of mind after your exams. It shows self awareness and self care. You've got to do what's right for you so if you feel that dropping uni for now is what you need to do, you've my full support.

Yes, my uni lets students drop units without academic or financial penalty if it's before the Census date. I'm doing 4 units currently. I want to do at least 3 units this semester, so the question for me is whether I want to drop 1 unit (and do 3) or stick with 4 units. My plan is to see how I go over the next couple of weeks before I make any changes.

Many thanks again 😊

[geoff]

hi Dottie, I agree with James and want to thank you for taking the time to reply to other people, because you know when you aren't feeling the best it can be very difficult to raise yourself up to that next level and help other people.
There is no blame for you not to be able to talk to your friends, because it may make you feel uncomfortable, afraid of what they might say in return, but this can be very common as we are never sure of what sort of reaction you will get.
What also happens is that a brave face is put on your face indicating to everyone that you are feeling good, but they never know exactly how you feel, but this is where all the problems begin to build up so you haven't got any release.
Uni can always be finished now or later on because what is much more important is how you are feeling, your health, as you are not able to achieve anything when you are feeling down or depressed, but when you feel on top of the world it's amazing how much you can do and what you do is that you enjoy all of it.
On top of the uni counsellor (6 visits) you are able to be put on a 'mental health plan' which your doctor will give you, and this entitles you to 10 free visits to see a psychologist.
If you want to drop down to 3 units before tomorrow then it may help you, and please never ever consider this as any part of failing, your not, your just being rational, and remember if you wish you can take up that other unit when you are ready, but can I suggest that you go and vist your GP to get the ball rolling.
We hope that we can keep hearing from you to other people but also for your own health. Geoff. x