My story

[Cina]

When i was a child my father was diagnosed with schizoaffetive dissorder, he would have episode's and was constantly in and out of hospital. A symptom of his illness is mood swings, sometimes he would become so angry and abussive for no reason, it was hard and confusing to deal with, i constantly felt anxious about what i said and did as i didnt want to provoke him. I feel this has alot to do with my own mental problems. I was diagnosed with social anxiety when i was 14. I left school when i was 15 and stopped talking all of my friends, it was just too exhausting constantly feeling anxious and uneasy around people. I tried going to college the next year and lasted all of about a month before it all got too much for me. I constantly feel uncomfortable and anxious around people even my family. I was also diagnosed with panick dissorder about 18 months ago, i get random panick attacks for absolutely no reason sometimes. I'v stopped doing things that i use to enjoy, things like exercise scares me because im scared of my heart rate going up and something happening.  I constantly have trouble breathing, my chest feels like something pushing on it or i feel like my throats closing up. Docters have run tests on me and assured me there is nothing wrong with me physically, but every time i have a panick attack or get these symptoms i feel like im going to die or that somethings wrong with me. Im just so sick of feeling anxious and uneasy all the time worrying constantly about having a panick attack or dieing, its so exhausting i just dont want to feel like this for the rest of my life. Sorry for the long post! 

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Cina,

Welcome to BeyondBlue and thanks for sharing your story.  It sounds like you've been dealing with anxiety for a fair while and I'm sorry that you are having these panic attacks.  Have you ever talked to a psychologist about it?

Even though they do feel very scary, it's great that you've gotten the all clear from your GP.  This means that instead of focusing on what's wrong we can focus on how to better manage them.

Do you know much about panic attacks?  In truth they are really common and there's lots of people who have them; if you have a look on the anxiety threads you'll see that lots of people are struggling with them like you are.  It might also help to read: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety/types-of-anxiety/panic-disorder 

As someone whose struggled and come out of panic attacks before, I think the biggest thing and the biggest first step is understanding what's happening to your body.  You do not need to be afraid.

You can get through this; it may take some time but you're not on your own. 

Take care,

[white knight]

Hi Cina, welcome

This topic has been covered many times her eon this forum and you are welcome to browse through the threads and read.

But in short, I have had anxiety most of my life and then conquered it!!. I had it throughout my childhood having had a anxious and Borderline mother (BPD). Then it all came to a head in 1987 at 31yo. The spark was a workplace issue.

In the beginning my therapist taught me muscle relaxation techniques. Tensioning up my muscles one by one for 15 seconds then releasing. I did this every night as I lie in bed ready for sleep. I really believed it was a waste of time. Along with some medication after about 12 months I felt improvement and the panic attacks slowly diminished.

After 12 years I could stop medication and a further 13 years my anxiety was zero, apart from general excitement. Yes, 25 years is a long time but it might not be anywhere near that long for you. To rid yourself from this the important things for you now are-

• Work closely with your doctor
• Learn relaxation techniques to slow your heart rate and feel relaxed
• Choose a career that will not be high in workload
• Have a hobby and a sport
• Teach yourself not to worry because worry isn't productive
• Keep toxic nasty people at a distance from you. All they will do is make you upset while you could be relaxing.

Remember, you nee to accept your anxiety as an illness just like any physical illness in that it just "wont go away". You need to approach your illness seriously as untreated it can lead to other more serious conditions like depression.

Google the following articles I've written to learn more-

"Topic- motivation-search and rescue it- beyondblue"

"Topic: being positive, whats the secret?- beyondblue"

"Topic: prevention is better than cure- beyondblue"

Good luck and glad to see you here.

Tony WK

[NatalieT89]

Hi Cina

 My father had the same condition, and I have been in the exact same situation that you are in now.

What If I told you one day you would be sitting around happy, relaxed and confident. That you could be satisfied and content?

Well.. It's possible. 

 1. Getting help for the anxiety, seriously. It sounds scary - but what you will do is actually control it - instead of it controlling you. Your capable of this. 

2. Breathe. Breathe again. There's no real pressure on you. Your putting it on yourself - about 10x the normal amount needed. Just take a few steps back , look around and see what is actually pressuring you? You will hopefully see nothing is. Your capable of this.

3. Friends will come and go. But its easier than you think. Go for coffee. Go for dinner. It will take about 2-3 hours. What else were you going to do in those hours? get out and try to stop thinking. Your capable of this.

4. Like me, you may, may fear you will be like your dad. If you do feel this way - decide to not live in fear. Have faith  in yourself, and say ' I choose to  give me a chance'. Your capable of this.

 Never ever stop trying 

 Natalie

[blondguy]

Hi Cina

My apologies for coming in late to your post.

Welcome to the forums and I admire you courage in posting too! (and Natalie...Hi)

Your symptoms are exactly the same as what I 'had' the good news is the anxiety attacks do lessen over time..

Tony WK is spot on here with his kind and heartfelt response....

I wont repeat what Tony WK mentioned...but just a couple a points that I hope may help you...

* The tight breathing is only a physical symptom of anxiety...nothing will happen...You will not die

* Yes Cina..the feelings are awful....and feel real....I remember..

* Your post is not long....its very good and well written

* If possible...try not to 'fight' the anxiety......just think of the symptoms as 'feelings'...nothing will happen

* Yes its easily said....but they are just 'feelings' bad ones yes...but they will reduce in intensity...

* Tony has brought up a brilliant point here Cina...Treat the 'bad feelings' as a physical problem which is correct being that the anxiety feelings are physical. I dont think you would 'fight' a broken leg....a virus....a bad toothache? If you can Cina...treat them exactly the same....you need to heal....

* You wont be like your dad Cina.....You are your own special person.....

If you wish it would be great to hear from you again 🙂

We are here for you Cina

Paul

Natalie....Thankyou...you have a lot offer here....please post back if you wish.. 🙂