Hi, I'm really sorry to hear about what happened 😞
A lot of us here I think,including me, have had the experience of being thrust back into a place we don't want to be in. I know, from recent experience, the process of losing somebody who, well, makes us feel happy and warm, is really terrible at times.
To answer your question, I guess one can't help but feel sad. Sadness, regret, guilt, are things I've felt during the process. They're just words on a screen right now, but I think it's fair to say a lot of us have had truly intense experiences of grief, where we're just absolutely distraught, sobbing, etc. Personally, I've had the experience of sobbing crazily in a toilet cubicle at school, listening to love songs, for longer than I thought possible, if it helps you relate with others who have been down a similar path. It's ugly, but just something we all go through during life. Everybody does have their own problems like this at some stage. Eventually, the well will dry up, and you'll be that tiny step closer to healing I hope. 🙂
A favourite quote of mine is 'look forward, not back, because that's not where you're going.' It helps to tell yourself, even vocalise out loud, that you are heading forward, and want to head forward in your life. Of course, it is sometimes a difficult decision to make the decision and tell yourself 'I will move on from this.' Once you do, there's things you can do, and like others have said, talking to others really helps. I find posting on these forums something that gives me purpose, even in a stage of grief.
Hopefully you can think back on the memories you shared with him with a smile 🙂
