Overcoming Selective Mutism

[Crumpet]

I was diagnosed with selective mutism which is a type of social anxiety when I was very young (around 3 or 4 years old). When I started school I wouldn't speak a word but at home I was very talkative. If I was around strangers I wouldn't say anything to them, not even hi or a wave.

At school, because I didn't talk I struggled a lot. The teachers were very strict. One time I remember my sister bit me on my hand at school so I bit her back. She then told the teacher on me. The teacher told me to say sorry even though she knew I had selective mutism. I tried to say sorry but I just couldn't say it. So she made me sit in the middle of a random class to 'humiliate' me and make the whole class stare at me - she said this in her own words. I was only about 4 or 5 then but I still remember it very well to this day.

One time I took a bathroom break and was thinking to myself. As silly as it sounds I was trying to persuade myself to speak one little word to myself. I tried to say a simple word such as ''hello'' but I physically couldn't. Also, because I couldn't speak or stand up for myself it made me more vulnerable to other students. The students would bully me a lot and I couldn't do anything about it. One boy kept on following me around and pushing me. I made signs by looking angry in my face to tell him I didn't like it and kept on walking away from him but he would continue to follow me. I wanted to tell the teacher but I couldn't. So instead I stood close to the teacher and that made him stop.

How I recovered is my mum pulled me out of the school because she thought it was a very bad school. I was out of school for about 4 years. My parents then had arranged to migrate to Australia. After dropping out of school my parents would slowly try to help my anxiety. They would encourage me to speak every day. I did soon start speaking a little bit to other people, but I was still a bit awkward towards them. After migrating to Australia I was doing a lot better with my social skills. It was a week before I was starting school in year 7. My parents would encourage me a lot and answer my questions and worries. For some reason the encouragement was the most effective and really helped me. Up to this day I am 15 years old and have a lot of friends. I'm the loudest person in my group of friends everyone says. I got through it mainly from encouragement from my parents and I really couldn't thank them enough.

[pipsy]

Dear Crumpet. What a gorgeous name you have chosen. My name is Lynda. I must say I have never heard of selective mutism. It sounds as though you were ultra-shy. Congrats to you for being able to overcome this problem and your parents should have a pat on the back too. I have a cousin (now in her late 40's) who was excessively shy), she could go away for holidays and hardly say 'boo' to a goose as the saying goes. On her return, she more than made up for it. When you spoke at home, did you stutter, sometimes this impediment puts us off talking at school or socially. Thank you for sharing your story here. Maybe others might read it and gain strength from your overcoming your difficulty.

Again - congrats.