Just want to tell someone about my thoughts today

[Thetormentofexistence]

I feel sad and numb. I feel like I’m always asking myself what do I want and what’s the point of life? Well, time and time again, I’ve answered those questions with the same answer: happiness. I want to be happy, the point of life is to be happy. However, I often don’t feel happy.

A close friend was upset with me recently over the seeming lack of interest I show her and our friends whenever we hang out. She says I’m distant and she feels like I don’t want to be there. I realised she’s right, and this has been going on for a few years now. I don’t know where my mind goes and why I can’t just have fun anymore? How can my life be so stressful to the point where I don’t even enjoy hanging out with my friends?

I’m not excited for work, or school. I don’t even know what I enjoy doing. It’s like I’m just going through the motions of life without ever taking it in, enjoying it or appreciating it.

[Azzdog]

Hi Thetormentofexistence,

I am really sorry to hear you are feeling that way. It has also got me thinking about my time at high school as well where I felt like I was just going through the motions and everyone else was having fun and enjoying life and seemed to have it more together than I did.

I like your answer to those questions. Being happy is a wonderful answer to the rampant consumerism we see in this day and age. I guess the problem you may be having, and correct me if I'm wrong, is that maybe the goal to be happy in life is a bit too broad and you need to narrow it down first to what makes you happy in order to get there. What do you think of that?

My relationship with my friends can be pretty stressful as well. Hanging out with them means I see a lot of triggers around which makes it hard to be more social. It also affects my friends as well as they don't know what to say or do in order to help me.

Have you thought of talking to a career's counsellor as they can be helpful in this situation. It could be a good idea to write down what makes you happy. It might be hard at the moment but I believe everyone has something that makes them happy. Believe me I've also been down that path as well.

I hope that helps in some way. Thank you for sharing. 🙂

[smallwolf]

Hi. Welcome to beyond blue.

I am not a trained professional. I am just like you - just another user on the forum that suffers from anxiety and depression. The problem with mental illness are that on the outside everything looks fine, but on the inside, it is a different picture? And you want to show your real self?

Can you speak with your parents about what you feel or going through? Or could you speak with a teacher or counselor at school? I do not want to preempt anything, so will only ask you this question...

- Have you looked at the K10 test on beyond blue? After answering a small number of questions it will give you a recommendation, what actions to take.

On the forums you will find other threads to help you manage your anxiety including...

Grounding yourself, What is it and how do you? - Beyondblue
Relaxation exercises - Beyondblue

Do a google search to find the above pages. As you are probably aware, knowing what your triggers help you manage it. My psychologist has also given me other tools, suggested apps to install my phone (only 2) and a 1 book to read. If you have any questions or want to chat, please let me know.

Tim

[Elle___]

Hey, I can definitely relate to this. I have no motivation to make effort with my friendships and I'm worried I'm losing them because of this. I mean my goal is just to make it until I can travel; then I will be happy. But what if I'm not? I don't know if you can relate to how I feel, but know you're not the only one. It's so real and normal, and it's frustrating and painful and sometimes you have no idea what to do, but I know how you feel.

[LavenderTea]

Hey thetormentofexistence,

I think Azzdog made a really good point about narrowing down your focus. It might be a good idea to make a list of the things that do make you happy, and work on including those things into your daily or weekly routines.

School environments can be tricky. As you go through school, you and your friends change, and sometimes what can happen is that you grow apart - you develop different interests and enjoy different activities. It's important to understand that this is okay, and it's something that happens often. Perhaps this is what's happening with you and your friends?

It is still important to have a good social network, especially if you're feeling down. Perhaps think of some common interests, or activities you both like and do them together? This might help with your overall mood, and may help things with your friend too.

LT.