just need to rant

[freddofrog]

just feeling really bored lately. like the kind of bored where all your mind csn think of is offing urself kinda thing. i have no close friends and absolutely no one to talk too. im not working atm but my mum says i need to get a job to pay rent, whihc is fine but i remember how drained i was witha job and dont wanna feel like that again... 

anyways lately my hobbies include scrolling through tiktok ans sleeping when im not at school.. anyone else relate 

i also have this big ugly scar so am DREADING summer (if i even make it to then) jks, lol. anyways my emotions are weird and unpredictable so i hate being alone and i hate myself and have no friends yuckkkkbyeeeeeee 

[Sophie_M]

Hey freddofrog,

Welcome back to the Forums. Thank you for your bravery and openness in sharing here. It sounds like you’re going through a really difficult time, we're sorry to hear you're not feeling like there's anyone around to talk to about how you're feeling. That sounds incredibly difficult. 

We’re reaching out to you privately to check you’re ok. In the meantime, we’d really encourage you to give our counsellors a call on the Beyond Blue Support Service. We are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636, and the team are really good at talking people through moments like this and working out options for more support. There's also our friends over at headspace, they can be amazing to talk to. You can find out how to connect with them in person, on the phone or online here.

If you’re feeling suicidal or are having thoughts about harming yourself, it's important that you take immediate steps to keep safe. If you feel unable to keep yourself from acting on your thoughts about suicide or self-harm this is an emergency and you need to call 000 (triple zero).

It also sounds like the Beyond Now suicide safety planning app may be a helpful resource to you. You can read about how it works and where to download it here: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/beyondnow-suicide-safety-planning . You can even call Lifeline on 13 11 14 and compete it together with one of their counsellors over the phone.

We hope that you find our forums to be a safe and supportive space to talk through your thoughts and feelings. Our community is here for you, and we’re sure they’ll spot your post soon enough and have some kind words and understanding for you.

Kind regards,

Sophie M

[ecomama]

Hi freddofrog

It's great you're reaching out for some ideas and support. 

You seem to have written a choice in your thread starter.... being bored with no friends OR getting a part time job. You might feel tired but it's a GOOD tired feeling, instead of a negative tired feeling of boredom. 

About your scar. Embrace it. It shows you are a survivor and are still here. 
It could even be a conversation starter! 

You might not like my looking at the cup half full take on things but constantly looking at the cup half empty or completely empty will take you down a rabbit hole. 

It's up to you what you make of your life! Seize the day and go for it. 

Love EM

[Beeee]

Hello freddofrog,

You've definitely come to the right place for a rant! We're always here to listen on the forums. 

Was there a specific reason you found your previous job draining? Perhaps this time, you can search for a job you'll really enjoy or if possible, just start of working a day or 2 a week, then seeing how you feel. Working can also be a great way to meet new people and make new friends. 

TikTok itself can definitely be a hobby, I know I spend far too long scrolling on there myself. Maybe you might start making your own TikToks, perhaps under an anonymous account, just for fun!

When it comes to your scar, I'm sure you're far more aware of it than anyone else will be. Most times, people are so worried about their own insecurities that they don't even notice anyone else's. And as ecomama said, embrace it, our scars are a part of who we are and reflect our personal stories. 

Hope you're feeling well and please reach out if you ever want to rant again ❤️

Beeee