Is anyone else having this problem? (Fornite is ruining my brother)

[JustSomeGirl]

My brother, along with millions of others, play Fortnite. I myself love to game but this new craze is worrying me so I decided to do some research. It turns out that Fortnite (much like Meth and other drugs) stimulates the brain in a way that makes it addictive and is actually damaging a lot of people's well-being. When ever he has a spare moment he's on that game talking to his bad-influence friends, screaming and yelling or at the very least talking to someone else about it. When I tried to discuss this with my brother his started screaming at me. Telling me to "Shut up" and "Stop" in a very loud, aggressive voice. Even after I had stopped speaking he kept on repeating it for a bit. My brother has never been like this before and it's not like he's a bratty 2-year-old. He's nearly 13 for God's sake. I'm worried about him. He tends to hyper-focus to escape his own anxiety but for the first time ever I was actually afraid of him and what he could do.

He's not abusive, and we fight sometimes like all siblings but it wasn't a usual yell-off. It was different and despite my attempts to yell over him to tell him to calm down and listen to me he somehow managed to get louder.

I know this probably sounds stupid so I wanted to put it up to see if others were having the same problem.

Thanks for your time.

(Also I didn't know where else to put this thread so I hope here is fine.)

[PamelaR]

Hello JustSomeGirl

You don't sound stupid at all!! Far from it. It is good to see you concerned for your brother's welfare and that you found the Beyond Blue (BB) forums. People on the forum are friendly, caring, supportive and respect your privacy.

I don't know much about the Fortnite game, though I just did a quick look at the reviews about it. I think you're right about being concerned that he's spending too much time gaming. You haven't indicated whether your parent/s are monitoring his usage. It may be necessary they set up some boundaries for when he plays games and when he doesn't. Are you able to speak with them about this?

Maybe there are other readers out there who have played the game or know about it and they can provide some input to you.

Kind regards

PamelaR

[Croix]

Dear JustSomeGirl~

I'm not sure it is Fortnite as much as the whole gaming thing. Computer games are absorbing, offer rewards and have a simplistic view of life. If real life does not seem as attractive, or is difficult in some way, then I'd imagine relying upon a game can indeed get one to the stage where it is the most important thing of all.

Having someone threaten to stop play could end up causing a lot of anger and yelling. I'm not sure your answer of 'yell over him' is going to do much other than make things worse. I'm sure he can hear, just rejects what you are saying.

As PamelaR has said it seems to me that this is something your parents should know about, and set boundaries. Have you had a chance to talk to them about this? Perhaps if you went into the conversation able to cite the number of hours per day your brother is gaming that might help. Also the change in your brother's attitude.

Your brother is lucky to have a sister like you to see to his welfare. We all need that at times.

Croix

You said your bother suffers from anxiety, and maybe from his point of view the world is not that great. If that is the case then then problem would need to be sorted at its cause, not the effect.

[DonPiano]

Hey JustSomeGirl

I've played Fortnite a little bit when it started out and quickly stopped as I found it a fairly toxic environment. As it's the 'new big thing' - and most importantly, free to play - every gamer under the sun is playing it. Because of the sort of competitive game it is, I've found it brings out the worst in people. A lot like Call of Duty did.

Do you play games at all? If so, maybe suggest if there's a co-operative game that you can play with your brother?

Do you know if he's playing with online friends or just by himself? If so, maybe suggest he plays a co-operative game which relies on teamwork? I moved from playing Fortnite to Rainbow Six Siege every so often, which relies on teamwork. I've found that's been a bit more positive.

The downside about online gaming is that it's a fairly toxic world. As mentioned previously - do your parents know about this? Also, where is the gaming setup situated? I've found that if the gaming setup is situated in a family orientated area, and not in a closed off room where nobody is able to see what's going on, then the interactions with the game are often less aggressive. If the gaming setup is in his bedroom, I would suggest to your parents that they maybe move it out of there as it might be affecting his sleep?

[MrDonut28]

As they say, too much of anything can be a bad thing! The best would be to find out how many hours a day he's playing, and then let your parents know.

[JustSomeGirl]

Thank you guys all so much for your advice and help!

I have talked to my parents about it and he now is hardly on it. His time on it dropped from around 4 hours on Fortnite a day to about two hours every three days.

His gone back to normal and is playing many other games. I believe that it probably was his competitive mixed with such a popular game and his rude, over-competitive play-mates.

I do game often myself but prefer to stay away from "Now" games for reasons like this. I've tried to get him to play other games with me but even now he doesn't want to play with his lame big sister unless it's on PUBG or Fortnite, both of which I refuse to play.

He's a lot better now and seems a lot happier.

Thanks again everyone for your help!

[PamelaR]

So pleased to hear things are going well for your brother JustSomeGirl.

Pammy