im stuck

[Tank_Engine]

Hey there.

This is all new to me. Im only 21. For the past 4 or so years ive felt quite off and down, but have always found stuff (whether it be work or friends) to keep my mind occupied. Over time It has slowly become worse. Ive always been a strong willed person and managed to cope and so nobody has taken notice, which worked for me.

Just recently I had a breakup with a person whom id become really close to. While im not very upset with them, I feel as though it was the tipping point and now find myself in a bad place and not sure how to get out of it. I feel as though ive given up. I find that talking doesnt seem to help and its extremely hard to keep my mind off thale fact that im down. I have seen my GP who believes I do suffer depression, and have booked an appointment with a counsellor. But im still stuck and just dont know how to deal with this or what to do. I feel helpless, but dont want to be stuck where I am.

Am I alone? 

[Zeal]

Hi Tank Engine,

You are definitely not alone. I was lost after completing Year 12. For me, this was a problem from the age of 17 until I was almost 21. I am now 22. I lacked confidence, I felt as if I didn't know who I was; and I struggled with the fact that my life was completely up to me, and with the sheer enormity of that. I discovered, through personal experience with mental illness during those years, that I wanted to study psychology. This was the turning point for me. I found something which really interests me, and that I'm passionate about.

Early this year I also started spending time with a new group of friends, which is partly why I'm happier now.  Right now, I am the happiest I have been in many years. My point is that this situation and these overwhelming feelings you have can and mostly likely will pass, as you find out what you love doing in life and what makes you feel happy and accomplished. This takes time and is a ''journey", as opposed to an end result or outcome.

I'm sorry to hear about your break up. That's hard, and hopefully with time the frustration will start to fade. It's great you've already been to see your GP. I hope your first counselling appointment goes well.

Keep in close contact with your family and closest friends; this is what I wish I did when I was unwell several years ago. Having support from others is absolutely crucial.

Good luck with everything!

Best wishes,

SM

[Narniakid]

Hi Tank Engine! Firstly welcome to BB and I applaud you for taking action.

Of course you're not alone! Just look at the statistic on the homepage - over 3 million Australians are suffering with anxiety and depression! Luckily, there is so much help avaliable to you. Have a look around the website for the info on dealing with and accepting depression. 

It is so common for us youth to finish school and then feel so lost - I finished school last year, and I was so close to relapsing into my depression because I had no idea what to do with my life! We live in a society where we can do absolutely anything we like and the amount of choice and opportunity there is can be extremely overwhelming! Don't be trapped in the idea that you have to decide straight away or even at all - there is nothing at all wrong with exploring and trying as much as you can! A solid life long career isn't for everyone, especially with so much the world has to offer!

What I'd recommend you do is sit down and write down all the places you'd like to visit one day, some of the jobs you think you might enjoy, the activities or hobbies you'd like to try, and then do some research and see what you can find - there are lots of short courses, volunteer work and clubs you can join to see what you like. Make a mood board of all the things that inspire you and keep it near your desk so you know what you're working towards and to keep you positive and motivated. 

Rememver that nothing will change unless YOU make that change. And I believe you have every ability to do so. 

Let me know how it goes with your counsellor and surround yourself with a good support network. 

Crystal

[pockets4health]

Hey there Tank Engine!

You are definitely not alone. My depression came into fruition at the end of year 12 and got increasingly worse until I did something about it towards the end of first year uni. Going to see the GP and booking an appointment to see someone about what you're going through is definitely a step in the right direction. The road to recovery unfortunately is gradual, it takes time and it can feel like you're constantly waiting for an appointment or a good day to come along but I promise you you won't be stuck there.

Break ups in themselves are painful, difficult experiences and they challenge us in many ways. It's natural that it would have a huge impact on your sense of who you are but I hope that moving forward you will be able to see this change as a blessing in disguise as it forced you to be honest with yourself about whats going on and it lead you to do something about it. 

What are some of the things that you like? Do you like music? Writing? I found a lot of solace in music lyrics and websites like tumblr that had heaps of inspirational quotes and pretty pictures. It made me feel less alone and I found that a lot of the time the music I was drawn to changed depending on how I was feeling. Using one of these avenues to explore your feelings a little may help make you feel less alone and also give you an outlet to express how you're feeling without judgement. Unfortunately until you see your counsellor, it is difficult to avoid feeling helpless but there is a purpose to this helplessness. It tells me that you want things to change and that you will work to change it. You have already done something many people spend a long time avoiding and that is admitting that you need help and you deserve to be happy.  

I think you're going to be ok tang engine, hang in here just a while longer and I'm sure you'll find you way.

V

[Felicity308]

Hi Tank Engine,

Welcome to the forum J. Well done for getting in touch with a GP, booking in a session with a counselor and reaching out online, it’s not easy to make those first steps so be proud of yourself for that.  

I can promise you that you’re not alone but I know that sometimes it does feel like that. You’d be surprised by the number of people you probably know suffering from similar problems and also by the number of people that care about you.   

Having a support network is something I believe is a really important part of managing this illness. I have used members of my family and close friends to help me get through my rough patches so I’d really recommend letting the people closest to you know what’s going on. Even if you don’t want to talk, sometimes it does just help to know that other people are aware that you’re going through something. 

After your session with the counselor hopefully you’ll feel like you have a bit of a plan in place and a few strategies to help you start to feel better but in the meantime have a look into strategies that other people use to cope. Some of the things I found work for me are:    

• Exercise
• Mindfulness Meditation (this one made a surprisingly big difference to me)  
• Ensuring I still spend time with friends 

Everyone’s experience is different but hopefully something that helped me works for you.  

Don’t give up, you’ve taken some really hard steps and you’re finally heading in the right direction. In your hard times keep reaching out because there’s always someone who cares and who will reach back.