Hi GeraltofRivia300,
First off, I would like you to know your feelings are perfectly valid and while it looks a bit bleak at the moment, it can only get better from here. I know you expressed how you don't want to involve your parents at the moment, but I believe you should definitely at least tell them what is going on, if not try to get in contact with any other friend or relative you trust and tell them. A problem shared is a problem halved and while you might feel a bit vulnerable, undoubtedly they have gone through at least some of the struggles you are going through and can offer some advice or coping mechanisms. As for your relationship, if you wholeheartedly believe that continuing it was damaging your mental health, uncomfortable etc. it is your choice and within your right to end the relationship. Your girlfriend also has a right to feel upset but definitely not to the extent of hating you. If you have done all the right things and she still resents you, you don't need such a negative influence in your life. You should leave her alone and associate with people who LOVE YOU FOR YOU and will support you through thick and thin, regardless of the decisions you make. Maybe try and spend more time with your sister during her tough time or travel to see your close friends when it is convenient. Regardless, I know you will get through this tough time. Try to remain as optimistic and positive as you can (easier said than done) and spend time with loving people. Regular exercise, sleep and good eating habits can also help to reduce your anxieties. Hope this helps (-; Stay strong!
