I don't know

[Dan21]

I don't know is basically my story, that's my answer to everything, I don't know if I want to stay or not to. I lie to my family about being okay because I don't want them to worry about me as much as they should. I was bullied all through primary school and I currently still am which doesn't help the situation, I'm more sensitive than other people, I'll get upset over the smallest thing unless you hurt my family or my only friend then yes I'd be pretty angry, I stay up all night because I can't sleep, I stay on the couch every day because I have no motivation to do anything, I don't even see my bestfriend because she's either doing something or I have no way of getting to see her which still makes me feel more alone than ever, I'm not the best with relationships either, I've been cheated on and even dumped a couple of days before my birthday yet to everyone I'm still the one that looks like the bad person, I get called a flirt because I apparently talk up too many girls but I only talk to my bestfriend or I'm really interested in someone but I'm not like those other guys that actually move from girl to girl, they still get to live a happy life though so why can't I? My father left when I was little and took my little sister with him, and knowing he abused my mother makes me worry so much about my little sister. All I want to do is be happy

[turtl3]

Hi Dan,

If all you want to do is be happy, then be HAPPY:). lying is not a good thing to rely on- one lie just leads to another lie, and soon you forget what the first lie was, and you become unstuck.

From what you've posted, it seems your family is concerned about you, as they've asked if you're ok, and you've admitted to falsely telling them you are fine.

There is nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to discussing your feelings with family, especially when they ARE concerned, family are the best friends you could even have, they are close by blood, which is stronger than bond.

My advice is to be open with them, they will not judge you like the children in primary school did. You sound like a very upstanding person, given that you said you're defensive of your family and friends.

I can relate to your feeling of wanting to sit on the couch and do nothing, but by doing so, your only going to miss out on the awesome things that life has to offer, and making great memories. if your parents cant help you to see your best friend, call a cab, or if shes not far away, walk? hopefully your able to get your license soon (if you cant already) to be able to see her, or maybe she can visit to you?

Try not to let bad people or bad events get to you, there are, and probably (unfortunately) always will be, bad people. and bad events are a just a part of life, everyone has them :(.

If you dont see yourself as a flirt, then your probably not. You're most likely just a social butterfly. You said that you only talk to your best friend or people who you are genuinely interested in, females can be 'just friends';) therefore the people calling you a flirt are most likely jealous that they don't have the courage to talk to ladies also.

I'm sorry to hear that your father left when you were young, that it causes you worry, he abused your mother, and has taken custody of your sister. Is there any way you can get in contact with her?

[Zeal]

Hi Dan,

It sounds like you feel trapped by your life at the moment. I felt a bit like this when I finished school. I spent much time at home feeling depressed and anxious about the future. I am now 21, and I am much happier than I was a few years ago.

Even though you don't want to burden your family with your negative emotions and worries, it's important to tell them what you are going through. From past personal experience I know how important family support can be. Without my parents' unfailing support when I was struggling, I would not be where I am now. Just confiding in your Mum would be a great first step. You could also try opening up to your best friend. If you have been friends for a while, I'm sure she will support you.

Seeing a counsellor or psychologist could be helpful for you. It's an option that is there if you need it - a GP can help refer you to the most useful service for your situation.

In terms of feeling unmotivated and unhappy, I can relate! The key to pushing through these horrible feelings is to find a purpose, in life I mean. Straight after high school I was confused about my future, and this caused me to become anxious and unhappy. Next year I will be doing my second year of a psychology degree. My "purpose" is to study to be a psychologist so I can help young people who are struggling with their mental health.

Talking to your sister and Dad, even just on the phone, could help you to gauge the situation. Maybe you could meet your sister somewhere to talk things through, so you can see if she's doing okay. It's great that you care so much about her. The fact that you know you are sensitive and seem to care more about others than yourself shows that you are selfless and compassionate. It's great that you are so caring. Just be careful that you look after and respect yourself too.

Being sleep deprived can add to the burden of depression. I used to have insomnia actually. When you are deeply unhappy and have many unresolved worries and thoughts, it can be hard to switch off and allow yourself to sleep. This sounds strange, but try typing or writing out your thoughts, issues, and negative emotions before you go to bed. This way you have a way to articulate some of these things, and it may be easier to "let go" of the troubling thoughts and emotions.

Good luck with everything Dan 🙂

[Dan21]

My mum has also struggled with depression which has also made me have thoughts about talking to her about it, but everytime I do try and talk to anyone about things I freak out which also is making things harder

I am currently see a psychologist and I've been telling her the same thing, that everything is okay I see her Monday so if I have the courage I'll tell her about it

I'm in year 11 and actually decided to become a psychologist too especially understanding some of the positions people with these kind of problems I can help with them

I have no way of being in contact with my dad and little sister which is why I worry so much about her