I don't know what to do anymore...

[crazycatlady13]

I'm a 22yo university graduate and over the past year I've been looking for jobs but have had no luck. I've recently been placed into Work for the Dole and it has made me even more depressed than before. I feel odd in the placement, most people aren't approachable to me but I've managed to befriend a person who is the same age and situation as me. I had a guy who I do not know just come up to me and asked if I had a boyfriend and it was that moment where I realised I had to get out of this. When I got home, I completely lost motivation and interest in anything.

I understand that people cannot live on welfare and do nothing forever, it's just that I could have avoided all this if I've been able to get at least a part time job. I need a job so I can finally get off Centrelink and stop visiting those helpless job recruitment agencies!

BUT, getting a job is easier said than done. I also have social anxiety and do terribly in job interviews. Most jobs require constant interaction and I'm so introverted that I feel like I'm not a good candidate for any job! I actually had a job interview today in my field of study but I feel like I won't get the offer.

Right now I am desperately looking for any part time job, whether it be retail or admin, just so I can get off work for the dole. Finding retail jobs are hard as it is for someone over 21. I don't have any connections or networks to help me. All my family who own businesses live really far interstate. The amount of experience I have is not that much as I never had a casual job when I was in my teens.

What can I do? Seeking professional help is expensive and I can't really afford it at the moment.

[white knight]

Hi ccl, welcome

Looking for work can be daunting even for confident people. But I think your worst enemy is your lack of positivity.

You've mentioned you are introverted among other things. Many people are. Many have physical disabilities to but they still get work if motivated.

I have a friend permanently in a wheelchair. He traveled 3 hours a day on trains for 7 years to become qualified as a teacher. He works lecturing the unemployed that are mostly healthy and capable young people that tell him their reasons why they cant find work. He says to them "look at me...I got a job"

What about joining the armed forces? I did join the RAAF at 17yo in 1973. It was my springboard for my future.

Tony WK

[HamSolo01]

hey there

I read through your post and couldn't help but feel empathy. I know what that feels like. I purposely extended my course til the end of the year so that I could find some work (so far not great) to at least provide a steady stream of something.

Firstly, it's awesome that you've made a friend in the same situation as you. That ALWAYS helps. Shame about the guy coming up to you. Weird.

It's great too that you want to come off of it. That shows you know you deserve better - with depression we have a low opinion of ourselves and this can often mean we accept circumstances that we nominally should not.

What did you study?

I have social anxiety (partly the reason I'm at home on a friday night writing this lol, but also because of friendship break downs too 😕 ) and depression. For guys it's all about talking yourself up and I do the opposite. Lately I've been trying to rewire the thoughts I have about myself to instigate long lasting change. It's taking a long long time. But I guess I say this to you to show that I know what you are going through.

I guess my next question is what experience do you have? No matter how small it is, include it in your resume. Consider volunteer work as well. I recently signed up to do volunteering at the airport for international student arrivals - but I'm yet to start due to my anxiety levels. I've also got a temp job coming up so it's all about balance.

I say this to remind you that things won't change overnight but they CAN change with a change in attitude. Part of me wishes that I was out there partying it up right now as I type this out but then the other half of me doesn't care for that anymore. I guess I just want bigger things in life hey? That requires a certain mindset and it certainly won't change overnight.

Also too, the money you get from your work for the dole program can help you. Invest it wisely and spend it on things that can help you. Maybe a short course? I'm not sure what the rate of the dole is now. Community Colleges are also a good pathway too. I've never had a solid job and have worked odds and ends. Haven't been on a holiday since 2009 with school lol. That is social anxiety and depression though hey? No need to beat ourselves up wishing we did things differently in the past. Focus on now as we are not our past.

You are worth it 🙂 the forums are here too 🙂 They've helped me so much 🙂 Remember things do get better and that you are thinking in the right way.

- Hamsolo01

[crazycatlady13]

Hey, thanks for your reply. Reading your last sentence has made me feel a bit better and gave me a bit of hope.

I majored in marketing but right now I am looking for any job, except for hospitality and labour. I am currently freelancing in social media marketing and have some experience in that.

The work for the dole role I am doing now is considered volunteering but I'm a bit skeptical in including it in my resume? They'll realize that I haven't done much than stay on the dole while job seeking and it probably won't make me look like a good candidate 😞

I am not really interested in further study right now but it looks appealing if I want to get out of WftD. Short courses do cost money and I'm not really in a position to do that right now. I spent the last 4 years studying full time, have a big debt and this is where I end up.

Everytime I think about my situation now, I end up crying. It sucks and I want to change it. I cried last night. If I could, I would get off Centrelink right now, but I have bills to pay every month.

I'm going to call my job service provider this week and see if I can change the WftD place to an office environment. Problem is I need to rely on public transport and the only reason why I chose the op shop is because it was close to my place and public transport.

[HamSolo01]

hey

Its good that you are keeping options open. Even if you have ruled out 2, that doesnt matter. Marketing i imagine, is rather broad. Thats also good because the skills you learn can be translated into different work environments. I guess my advice would be to think laterally. Outside the box in other words.

Its also good how you are freelancing in social media. Thats good experience. It is relevant too.

You could put down on your resume that you currently volunteer. But no need to say its because of wftd. In my small experience with work I have found it pays to lie. I lied about my school results to get a job as a tutor. They didnt ask for them. But really.. i had no other choice. My mental health held me back enough. Tutoring is something I have done for a number of years now and has footed a small bill. I think in some cases in life we have to lie because otherwise we knock ourselves down before we start. I wouldn't have gotten anywhere without tutoring tbh. I enjoy it too. But it's a stepping stone. Ill be done with it at year's end. I guess WftD is the same idea, but if you dress up your experience as actual volunteering it looks good. Tbh i see no reason why you couldnt do that actually. Honesty is great but sometimes it holds us back when we are depressed and anxious - i still sell myself way short. Im beginning to learn that a lot of people bullcrap their way into jobs.

Sorry to hear you get upset about it 😕 i guess there is a small comfort in the fact that many graduates are in a similar position. But then dealimg with mental health sucks too. I know how you feel though so i hope what im saying helps.

The further study option is maybe something for later. But i do see your point about hecs debt. You dont wanna use up more money. I feel the same.

I admire your determination too. It's encouraging. You have grit and thats good 🙂

You have identified a possible alternative in contacting your jobseeker agent so thats showing you are switched on

Hang in there. You can do it. Never feel afraid to keep posting here.

[Lucyelyse]

Hi, after reading your post it helped me realise that there are others in a similar position as myself. I admire your courage to post about your struggles with this as it is a big yet positive step to seek help to move forward. Although I have not experienced the marketing field I have had experience in the arts area as I tried the freelance photography and graphic design path. I can only imagine and assume that it similarly difficult to find work. I too myself am introverted and at times force myself to be extraverted to get a job but always stumble at some stage in the process of getting a job. It is not easy.

I used freelancing websites such as Upwork and I also would always look at 'the creative store australia' website for creative jobs. Although websites like upward are not typical ideal they are a bit of a start, to get your work out there, to practice negotiating skills, strength client communication and building portfolios. I guess every bit counts in situations like these. Try not to internally pressure yourself and self destruct with thoughts of worthlessness or failure because you are far from worthless and you are not failing, you are young and are creating your journey and learning from your experiences. Try to see your experience reviewing it from a different prospective, you have an advantage, use this time to do what you love and as Hamsolo01 as said "...think laterally. Outside the box...".

After all "Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself" - George Bernard Shaw. (one of my favourite quotes that has helped motivate me overtime).

You have just been knocked down don't let it keep you there as I truely believe that you will succeed not only just within your career but with anything that you put your mind to, because you are young and with that comes resilience, strength and more room to improve and grow :).