Hello :3
I worry all the time, I'm nervous, I cry daily (sometimes for no good reason at all), I feel empty - nothing brings me joy like it used to, I'm pushing friends and family away, I have become very self critical and stress like no one else. This has all become strongly apparent to me in the last month, however looking back on things a lot of this started mildly over the last year.
I had a fantastic childhood, growing up with my parents and older brother. I had many friends and best friends, participated in school activities and danced after school daily. My grades we average or slightly above, I had a real artsy side to me yet was also on the sports teams. I loved primary and high school.
I was lucky enough to get my first uni preference and am currently finishing the last semester of my 4 year degree. Additionally I work part time as an assistant in the field I am studying, and just celebrated my 5th anniversary with my boyfriend. This is what makes me so frustrated!! I have no legitimate reason to feel the way I do! I could sleep for days, every morning is a struggle to get out of bed, I eat to fill the emptiness emptiness inside, which leaves me feeling guilty and angry at myself. I have bailed on all Social outings and love the excuse of 'I'm not feeling well' to get me out of any human interaction. I have given up on my personal appearance and spend every day in my sweatpants and gym clothes ( not that I have time or motivation to go to the gym). The pressure of uni and work makes me snap at everyone, and leaves me with heart racing hen ever I think about my stressors.
I cant tell you the last time I have smiled or laughed. Everyday is a grudging battle leaving me tired and drained.
How did I get here?
Someone like me shouldn't be feeling this way.
Help x
