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how do I tell my parents about my depression?
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Skyblue, it is so brilliant that you are looking at getting some support, I think that is great.
With your parents - could you do something in writing to make it a little easier to open up the conversation? Write a short letter? Print out your post? Print out some information on depression and give it to them (even if they already know it all, it just helps to start things off).
All the very best and keep posting 🙂
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Hi skyblue18,
I am too, new to the forums, so welcome.
Firstly would you mind discussing why your mental health has spiralled downhill? I'm glad to see you have spoken to headspace and completely agree it's great to talk to someone face-to-face, there's only going forward :).
What's your relationship like with your parents now? How do you guys usually discuss family matters? It seems your parents want the best for your sister; I'm sure it will be the same for you.
What sort of strategies help you with your anxiety/panic? I like to listen to loud music (Poor Neighbours haha)
I can relate to you about telling your parents things; I can't seem to say to them I'm gay 😞
If you don't mind me asking what are you afraid of telling them?
Well hey, you've told us you're struggling, so that's a good step in the right direction, let's work together and amongst to the forum to get you back on your feet
C
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If you like you could go into more detail if you want to, the other option is to click on 'Get Support' and scroll down until you see
Publications to download or order, then ring up BB and order the booklet or download the information, print it out or bring your mum/dad over to read the booklet on your computer/phone.
Face to face is the best way to get help, some prefer doing it by phone or email if that's possible, but your eyes and your expression mean everything to the doctor.
The last couple of years you have been pretending that everything is OK, but deep down you have been struggling because it does become exhausting making out there is nothing wrong.
Please let your parents know.
Geoff.
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Hi
some of the reasons why my mental health got worse towards the end of last year were the fact that I was so tired and sick of hiding behind a fake social mask. no one understood me and I felt so unwanted and unloved. everything became an effort and being at an academic school like mine there's is also a lot of pressure and stress to always do good and put your life outside of school on the line in order to get good grades. my family relationship is mutual, they generally don't include me in family discussions/matters and always treat me as if I'm 10 years younger than I am. I have also had a few health problems that make life a bit difficult eg the toxoplasmosis in my eye (that nearly left me blind) and my brain (which doesn't affect me/who I am). there are a thousand and one more reasons why everything went downhill, people in my life passing away, the way I get treated by my so-called friends and a lot of others I can't really explain. it was as if the world had turned against me. to control my anxiety (this might sound weird but) I drink water as it encourages my body to take deep breaths as I can only breath through my nose. I also like to go outside and get fresh air and like you listen to music. i don't know why i am so afraid of telling them. like I know they will react in a positive way and will want to help me but there is a part of me that is petrified of what may happen that most likely won't. I also don't want them to treat me different like I obviously want them to show that they care and all that but I mean I don't want them to see me as someone who hates themselves or someone who isn't mentally stable etc. As you can tell I'm not that great at explaining things (especially my feelings), I never have been the best at English but I hope you can understand anything in all this text haha.
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hey stormcloudz,
thank you for your suggestions I will most definitely try to give it a go as it seems a lot easier and less intimidating.
Thank you very much,
Skyblue
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Hey Geoff,
it really does become exhausting and draining, especially pretending for so long. I know my parents need to know and I've done plenty of research my main problem is letting them know as for some reason (for which I don't know why) I find it quite intimidating.
Thank you so much for your advice,
Skyblue
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Yo Skyblue,
It's alright, as long as you can be heard, unfortunately, I'm not passing English this year (AND ITS YEAR 12) so you're all right.
You mentioned you are sick of hiding behind a fake social mask, and that no one understood you, Why do you believe no one understood you? I know the false social cover all too well, hiding as a straight male because I feel no one will want to be friends with me or will start cracking gay jokes 😞
I also completely understand your attitude around school, I am so sick of it and just want to get out and start working. Hopefully, my graduation will come sooner (4-5 months away). What year are you in?
Remember who you are and just be yourself. No matter what you're told at school, e.g. It may be a stressful time but just put in your best, and you'll be okay.
Regarding your family, as Geoff said, find what best suits you and go for it. Have you tried improving your mutual relationship before? Sometimes it can be difficult, especially I know with my family, sometimes we're on, sometimes we're off and it can get confusing with the arguments as such.
Sorry to hear about your health issues, I don't have much experience as such, but I know it can be difficult.
and I like your attitude regarding "which doesn't affect me/who I am." Keep that up.
Don't worry skyblue; the world hasn't turned against you, as it may seem. Tell me more about your friends, How do they treat you? Why do you think it is? Are they just being boys/girls? Have you tried speaking to them about the issues you're experiencing or are they not the right people to talk to?
I like the way you deal with your anxiety, and in no way am I judging, you should consider sharing it with other users. I think it's an excellent way to remind yourself to say "Hey, Take a step back, take a deep breath (through your nose of course ;)." If it works, it works.
Hahaha, music is soo cool. What sort of genre/artists do you like to listen to? I'm a big fan of Indie Music especially Bastille and Kevin Garrett when I'm unusually moody.
There's a real doubt in me that your parents will react negatively and I sincerely hope they don't, as I mentioned before taking the path you want to, whichever is most comfortable. Personally, I would prepare for all aspects, explore your options, get some extra information and sit them down and try and have a conversation about it.
1/2
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The only thing I can suggest about treating you differently is to say to them "Hey, I don't want you guys to treat me differently after this, this doesn't change who I am." I don't think you will need this anyway; I believe they would support you ultimately, you're still their son.
You've explained this quite well; I'm proud you reached out for help in the first place and are looking forward to your reply.
C
2/2
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the reason why I don't think anyone understands is that some of my family (most of them) believe depression is a stupid excuse to get attention and is easily curable (I obviously agree). like you
with your question about music, haha,
thank you 🙂
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