How do I know if im depressed?

[Brooklyn1999]

I feel like since about half way through last year, I've just not been myself, I've been through alot since then, I've broken up with a boyfriend because things wernt working and he was a toxic person you could say, I've lost a childhood best friend and she was also tangled up in issues with my ex boyfriend , she betrayed me and I am now dating a new guy and its been 4 months but at times we argue, their small arguments over silly things but I feel like its always my fault and lately I've been feeling like I can't do anything rightkind of generally speaking and I let everyone down and I just dont feel like the happy person I used to be and I feel like it started last year. I don't really want anyone saing I should leave my boyfriend because I don't necessarily think that's causing it,so I would appreciate if people could give me advice not based on that , thankyou heaps.  I just want some validation on what I'm feeling. I've read that feeling like you can't do anything right and wanting to dissapear are signs of depression is this true and in that case what do I do? I don't feel like this all the time however I do feel as if im not the same happy person I used to be , thanks everyone

[Paul]

Hey Brooklyn,

Welcome to Beyond Blue forums. It's great you jumped on here and let us know how you are feeling and also had the courage to question what you are feeling.

There's a quick test on the site here called the "Anxiety and Depression Checklist" In the menus above choose "The facts" then "anxiety and depression checklist"

Please keep in mind that this isn't a definitive test, it's just a guide as to whether you *might* be depressed or be feeling anxious.

I think the next thing to do is to have a chat with a professional, your Dr or school counsellor or a psychologist. They will definitely be able to determine if you are depressed but also be able to help you with what to do next if needed.

From reading your post I get the feeling there's some sort of loss that might be making things worse. Perhaps losing the relationship with your first boyfriend and also your childhood friend. It's really easy to be angry with people when they do things that we don't like, it's also easy to be angry to help us get through losing someone. Loss can also make it extra painful even thinking about losing something close to us again, a bit like what you mentioned with your current boyfriend. Sometimes it's losing something like a relationship or friendship but not the people that still hurts.

The buildup to losing someone or ending a relationship can be really tough as well.

I could be incorrect in how I've interpreted your post, so it's really important to talk to your Dr or counsellor to help you through how you're feeling and to help explain what's going on.

I'd love it if you would drop by again and let us all know how you're getting on. We love to listen because we all understand what it's like to be confused and in pain.

Take good care Brooklyn.

Paul

[geoff]

dear Brooklyn, hello, and by having 'small' arguments or even major arguments with your b/friend is not out of
the ordinary, couples always have a disagreement and as much as you feel uncomfortable with them it's rather good
for a relationship, it keeps it alive and make us know that whatever we are doing does not suit our b/friend or g/friend
so we come to an agreement, and just because you had a fight certainly doesn't mean that you have to split.
I'm tending to pick up that your best friend might have had something going on with your previous b/friend nd if so
then this would be a great disappointment for you.
I'm not sure how old you are, but that doesn't really matter, however you're posted in the 'young section', but in any relationship
whether it's just a new one or whether you're been together for 40 years disagreements always happen, it's part of the
course, it keeps the relationship alive, and better still making up is the best part.
There is a point you make 'not the same happy person I used to be', don't be so hard on yourself, because during our life,
our feelings change, our reactions change, our job, move house, our taste in clothes, out thoughts about people all of
these change no matter how old we are, so can we stop this maybe but probably not, because what we do in life takes us
to other areas, other situations, other areas of our life, and we can't stop this, it's only natural, so having an
argument with your b/friend is the first of many.
At the time we hate these disagreements but they make us think. Geoff. x