Good days and Bad days

[Sj93]

Hello All, recently learning that i have anxiety and depression has been a big step this year, but of lately the past 3-6 months has been where i have seen my anxiety and depression start to take over my life. Its not being able to concentrate at work where i will start to tear up at my desk for little to no reason, seeing an old friends Facebook post or a work dilemma nothing can easily send me into a panic attack. Which that would of never affected me before but it is now. Its now gotten to the point where i feel like a total different person. I was once so happy and cheerful known for being that bubbly person, but i feel it sinking further and further back down, im no longer wanting to go out or have the fear (all in my head btw) that my presence is no longer wanted or the night might go awkward im constantly worrying about things out of my control, real or in my head. Then there is some days i wake up feeling great and push everything im feeling away and get on with me day, although it feels like its so much effort to even do so, how can it feel like effort to be happy now? i dont know. On these good days everything is great and i can laugh and hang out with friends, but anxiety and depression always has a way of coming back like today. All this week i have been feeling my self again slowly and even though it requires more effort , i thought i had beaten it even though i know its not a head cold its depression and anxiety, so silly thought really. I just dont know how it can switch and so quickly, and then i have that disappointment that i cant even be happy any more.

I would love to hear anyone else who has good days and bad days how do you cope how do yo make the good days last longer

Thank you

Sj

[Doolhof]

Hi Sj,

A lot of us can so relate to all you have written here. The good and the bad days come as they please at times.

There is a thread here called "Three things to be thankful for". If you have a look at that, you may find there are so many things each day that you can be thankful for and may not even realise it.

When you are having a good day, write down things that do make you happy, activities you enjoy, friends you like hanging out with.

When you are having a bad day, take a look at the list you have made.

If you are due to go out and you feel lousy, try to encourage yourself to go anyway. Once I get to where I am meant to be, I usually end up enjoying myself, it is just the getting up and going that is hard at times for me.

Find ways to stop those negative thoughts before they become too strong.

Look up ways to help with your depression and anxiety. See what suggestions will help you.

Sometimes I take photos of the good things in life. Even if they are photos of a pretty flower, an unusual shaped cloud, a friend smiling, a sunset, all those things help to add to feelings of happiness and pleasure.

I used to have a collage of pictures on my office wall. It made me feel better about life.

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

[james1]

Hi Sj,

Reading your post just felt like you were reading all the thoughts swimming in my head. I absolutely relate to what you're saying.

And I think the hardest part is always knowing, in the back of our minds, that the bad day will come eventually.

Mrs Dools has some great advice. The only thing I'd add to that which I do is I try to even out my good/bad days as much as I can, so on the good days I make plans to meet all my friends at various different times. I also tell those friends that, if I refuse to come out then, could they please try to drag me out anyway, or just come over to my place. This way, when the bad days roll around, I -have- to get up and I -have- to meet people. And I know that's good for me.

So I don't necessarily try to make the good days last longer. I guess it's more a matter of making the bad days more manageable for me.

I hope that helps. I'd love to hear your thoughts!

James

[Doolhof]

Hi Sj and James,

James, I really like your idea of asking friends to come around and get you anyway for outings or to meet at your place! That is so excellent! You must have some wonderful friends!

Thanks so much for sharing that strategy with us. Might give that one a try myself.

A thought on this, sometimes people don't always visit when they say they will and we may feel like they have let us down. We don't know what other people are going through, so don't be disheartened when this happens.

I also have friends who love me to visit them, but do not reciprocate as they say I live too far away! They just don't seem to get the fact that it takes me just as long to reach their place as it does for them to get here!

Today I am going to try my best to turn a rather low day into something good! Hope you all have the desire, strength and determination to try to do the same!

Cheers all from Mrs. Dools

[james1]

Hi Mrs Dools, yes, I consider myself super lucky to have some really great friends. I also have friends who, like you said, don't always hold up their end. And it hurts at the time, then I tell myself that the difference between the two groups, generally, is that the ones who stick by me are those who have experienced depression, whether first hand or second hand.

I'm so glad to hear you're trying to turn a bad day into a good day. Well done! I had a terrible day yesterday, and I made a pact with myself to drag myself into work today if it was the last thing I did, by sending friends an email telling them I'd be at work today. So I'm here, and I'm not alone with my thoughts at home.

I hope you, and anyone else who reads this, has a good day!