Friend came out as bi and I don't know how to feel now as I am secretly in love with her

[Spud]

I am male. I have known this girl for five years. When I first met her I knew there was something special and I have secretly been in love with her since then but we can't be together due to professional reasons. I know too she has had feelings for me as well and it is very obvious. We were apart last year but reunited this year. Things have been really great until this month. A few days ago she sprung on me that she thinks she might be a lesbian which I thought she was joking but then she changed that to being bi. To be honest I was a little heartbroken about it. I know it isn't about me but I said I support her and that I will always be there for her which she was appreciative of.  I said I feel quite special that she told me. She hasn't told her family or other friends but me. I said this is a big thing, she responded that she doesn't think so. I asked her how long has she felt like this, she said just this month.  I don't know if this is just a moment of self discovery or whatever, I haven't seen any signs, it just caught me really off guard. I don't know now if she really had any feelings for me and it might of just been me. But I think this has really changed things between us as I don't think she sees me in anyway more than a friend now as her focus has shifted to the same sex. She always use to sign off with the xo etc but that's died off. 

[TrueSeeker]

Hello

I can see how confusing and heart breaking this is for you. It looks like that your friend is not very clear on what she wants and likes. It is her life and she needs to find her own way through it.

To make it a bit clearer for you, have you tried to have an open discussion about the relationship between two of you? I can see that you have your hopes up about things getting more romantic. It could help you a lot to find out how she feels about you so you can create a better life for yourself.

I can understand that it can be scary to find out the truth but unfortunately without it, it's very hard to improve things. You do deserve to be loved and have healthy relationship.

I wish that it'll all work out for you, please let us know how you're going whenever you need to

[Spud]

Yes it's very heartbreaking being in love with love with someone I can't be with at the moment. I'm afraid if I told her it will make things weird between us, I rather have a friendship than nothing.