Hi all, so I'm a guy and I feel like I can't express my feelings or anyone to my mates because they'll think I am weak, I have only spoken about this with one very close friend. So I am resorting to the forums for help.
I had my first real relationship with someone, she was from Europe, she is 18 and I am 19, and she was studying at a university for 6 months. I met her on the first day out of sheer luck and wanted to get to know her more because I have always wanted to live in her country (and still do now).
Fast forward 6 months, we have been pretty much head over heels for one another, we were each others first everything, being physical, intimacy, sex, love. She really loved me, she told me her parents never showed their love to her much because she was the middle child, but my love for her was gradually making her a better person, as months went on, she would be more expressive towards me. Love hit me like a train, I felt like she was my soulmate, the kind of love that you can feel circulating through your veins every time you were with eachother. We broke up because of distance, we tried to get it work, I flew to Europe 3 months ago, for a month. I can only visit her about 2 or 3 times a year..for a month each. She wanted to break it up because she felt too much pain, it was her choice, but she would like for us to be back together again when I decide to graduate in 3-5 years and move to her country. She wanted us to stay best friends for now, and only time will tell
here is where I need help;
I loved her so much. Am I crazy to generally feel that even though we haven't been together for even a year, I would do anything for her? That's not expression. Literally. This is not normal, most people..especially guys, don't feel this way. If she had a car accident, or something happened to her and she was mentally disabled, I would still love her so much. Once I got attached that's it, it's either ride or die, If I couldn't see her for a year, I wouldn't care, I would stay loyal. That's how hard I fell
I'm just an 18 year old guy, who has been crying constantly for these past few days, I can't control my emotions, I can't go outside or I'll just break.
Because I know we have an opportunity left, we broke up not because of hatred but because it isn't our time yet. So I all can think about is what can I do for us to have a better future so I can love her forever. It's not logical to give up on something when there's still so much opportunity left.
