Dear Cloudyy
Welcome to the Beyond Blue community. It's sad that you feel this way after making progress for a while. Why it happens I am unsure. I suspect it has to do with your physical health and additional stress. But sometimes it seems to come out of left field and whack you around.
I expect you know depression is called The Black Dog and it follows you around whether or not it is wanted. The trick is to make friends with it, teach the dog some manners and keep it firmly in its place. And this is no easier than teaching a live dog to behave, not chew slippers, nip your heels, jump all over you or bark all the time.
The trick I have found is to keep your sights on the immediate present. Not on finishing uni, not on completing this semester, not even on what you will be doing next week. What is happening for you today and how can you manage this. Sometimes it is better to focus on the next hour only. The feeling of powerlessness sweeps over us when we try to make plans for the future and neglect what is happening in the now.
It's OK to take a break from the world for a short time. Go for a bit of a walk on your own because you need to incorporate exercise into your routine. Eat good food but not necessarily huge meals. A little bit often is better for you at this time. e.g a piece of fruit, a sandwich, small light snacks. Think about the food you are eating and enjoy the taste and texture without allowing other thoughts to intrude.
When it comes to study and assignments, go slow. Say you will do one of the tasks for one hour and then stop. No matter if you can do more, just stop. Set an alarm clock if you like to keep you honest.
Once the hour is up go and do something active. This is a good time for walk. Sit in the sun with a coffee, or whatever. Not alcohol. Read a book. Any activity you enjoy and makes you feel good. Then after a while go back to the books for another hour.
This will give you a huge sense of achievement without exhausting your emotional energy. If you don't feel like study, find another activity for a while. The only rule is that you do have several study periods during the day and that they each last for one hour only. You will be surprised how much you can achieve in these short bursts without crashing down.
The accepted best learning practice is to have short, frequent lessons or learning times. The brain retains the information more clearly and more readily. It is also more accessible when you need it. Let us know how you are going.
Mary
