Dear A13xx~
Welcome back, it's good to hear from you again even if the reason is a difficult one.
I think the first thing I should say is that you are in no way a loser - quite the opposite in fact. Life has handed you a very had time with an alcoholic abusive mother, an eating disorder (I hope it is better BTW), a father you can live with but is not really much help as he may have expectations, and difficulties at school, both wiht results and friendships -a lot of which would have come about by times away from school
There's more, but that is an impressive list by itself. To establish yourself and hold down a 40hpw job despite all this is a pretty big thing.
Almost forgot to ask, how do you get on wiht your brother?
Yes I can see how ATM life seems all work and not much else. At one stage I had (shift) work and sleep and no energy or real opportunity to do anything else, it sort of was most of my life.
Friendships will come, and if not from work then other places. It's only normal those you knew at school fade away, After all you no longer have school in common and see each other as part of it. Sadly that's tends to be how it works. The good news is you find others as your life expands. If you are lucky you find not just people to hang out with but a very few who become life-long friends.
So how do you expand your life? I guess the best thing is to do what you enjoy and see where it leads you. I do remember you saying you were good at music. Does that mean you play or sing? Was there a particular sort of music you liked listening to? I really like Tom Waits who's range goes from really dark up to fun.
I hope you would feel like talking here some more, you are not alone and always welcome.
Croix
