fear of vomiting

[Madi-]

My name is Madi and I am 16 years of age.

I have went to 2 councillors and have made multiple appointments with doctors but I can't seem to get rid of my fear. 

I have been living with a fear of vomiting for about 4-5 years now but it's never been this bad. 

My friends usually laugh about it so I can never really tell anyone about how I'm feeling. 

through having this fear I have gained mild anxiety and mild depression. i need to talk to someone that is going through the same feelings I am because I feel that no one understands. As people always tell me (it's all in your head, get over it) 

in scared to eat because I'm scared I will get food poisoning. I can't wear the same clothes I have once vomited in. I can't sleep in the same position i was in when I have vomited, I cannot wear my hair the same way I did when I vomited last. I can't listen to music or watch the same things I did on the day I have vomited. It stops me from doing ever day life things. I'm 16 and feel I should not have to be scared of anything at this age and I should be out having fun instead of saying "no" to everything because I'm scared to vomit. 

 i have no one else to reach out to and I feel that I need to be fixed soon. Because I want to be able to have kids and not be afraid of them getting sick of I cook them food. Or not being able to look after them because they are sick. I want to be able to kiss my boyfriend after he has ate food that has once made me vomit. I want to be able to kiss him after him being sick ( not just after vomiting) and I want to be able to stay in the house even when someone else in the family is sick. 

 i can't even sleep by myself in case I wake up in the middle of the night and vomit. I need someone to be there with me. 

I really need help, I'm begging. 

[Narniakid]

Hi Madi, and welcome to the forums, thank you for sharing your story.

I have a mild fear of vomiting that comes along with my panic and anxiety attacks, however I have not experienced it in such an extreme case like yours, and I am sorry to hear that you're having such a rough time.

Since you have had no luck with the councellors and your doctor, I would definately give the hotline a call, and they will be able to help and direct you on the right path. I'm quite sure your fear is linked to severe anxiety, and so I would also consider seeing a psychologist and hear their opinion on it. Don't give up on seeking professional help - someone who knows how to help you is out there!

Crystal

[Zeal]

Hi Madi,

I can relate to what you're going through. I have a moderate to severe phobia of vomit. When I was about 10, my vomit phobia started becoming obvious. It was most severe in my teens, when my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (an anxiety condition) was the worst. I was diagnosed with OCD at the age of 13, and I still have it now, at 22. It's much more manageable now though, due to medication I take and increased awareness of what triggers my anxiety.

I have also been to various doctors and professionals in the past, regarding both my OCD and vomit phobia. I am much better with it now, but if someone in my household is physically sick (which luckily doesn't happen often), I get really anxious still. When I was about your age, my OCD and vomit phobia was really bad. If someone in my household was sick, I would avoid being anywhere near them, and would often eat my meals in my bedroom.

To be honest, I haven't found a "solution" to this phobia we suffer from. For me, being able to live with the underlying fear without it negatively impacting my life has just taken me time. Being treated for OCD helped with my vomit phobia, as they are linked. My OCD revolves around my fear of germs, illness, and being contaminated by dirty things. I still go through periods now where my OCD will get a bit worse, like when I am stressed or sleep-deprived.

It's worth going back to your GP with a fresh outlook, and maybe showing him or her the message you posted on this forum. Finding the right person to help you is important. Your GP can refer you to a new psychologist or counsellor, if you are willing to try someone else. Otherwise, your GP can be your source of help and advice. It sounds as though you have severe anxiety (possibly OCD) as well as this phobia. Crystal also gave you good advice about how to seek help 🙂

You are definitely not alone - there are others out there with this phobia. It's hard to overcome, but can definitely become a manageable low-grade fear that doesn't make your life difficult. It took me years to get to the point I am at now. Hopefully you can find some respite from this intense fear a little quicker than I did. The reason my phobia has taken longer to become manageable is because of my OCD.

With the right help, and with support from family, close friends, and from your boyfriend, you can start to break down this fear 🙂

Best wishes,

SM

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Madi,

Thanks for reaching out to BB.

I'm sorry that you are going through such a tough time right now with a fear of vomiting and I'm really glad that you reached out to us.  Honestly the first step with anything (whether it's a fear, anxiety or depression) is just to admit it.  But you've already done that and you've already reached out to a doctor and a couple of counsellors already so I think you should be really proud because that's hard to do.

I'm really interested to know what happened when you saw your doctors and the counsellors - did they help at all?  What did they say?

I know when I had my anxiety creep up the first time it wasn't directly related to vomiting but I went and saw maybe 3 or 4 counsellors before I found someone that I liked and someone who could 'get' me.  So I really want to encourage you to try again.  There is a way to help you overcome this but it just takes a bit of time working through that fear one little step at a time.

In the meantime - maybe you could make a list of all the things you do that make you not think about vomiting - so situations where vomiting is furthest away in your head and you're just caught up in the moment. You could be taking the dog for a walk or scrapbooking.  Then when you are having a bad moment or worried about it you could try reverting back to that list.

Good luck with finding someone who can help you 🙂

[Madi-]

I would like to thank you all for this.

I have tried medications but always forgot to take them and they would make me feel sick and even more upset. So I thought I would be better without. 

I I really appreciated the replys

[shad0wings]

Hi Madi!

Responding to your most recent reply, unfortunately most medications have side-effects of nausea, however it passes after a few weeks. You have to try and push through the best you can, however it sounds like you are really struggling. About forgetting medication, try setting a reminder in your phone or asking your parents to remind you to take it - that's what I had to do when I first started! 

Try to see a psychologist or a specialist in phobias. It sounds like you have a severe case of phobias towards vomit/vomiting. 

Try finding a new hobby or something else to distract you from your thoughts (TV, reading, drawing, writing, gaming, puzzles, apps).

You are an incredibly strong girl and I know you will fight til you feel better! 🙂

~ Taylor

[Felicity308]

Hi Madi,

Your phobia sounds extremely hard to live with and I hope you are proud of yourself for not just coping but seeking out help.

I'd really recommend having a look for a psychologist that specializes in phobias and anxiety. Also it may be an idea to get a referral from a GP to go and visit a psychiatrist that specializes in these areas as well.

Often people go and see multiple psychologists/psychiatrists/GPs before they find one that suits them so I'd recommend doing this. I know its hard to go to a new one if the last 2 haven't worked for you but it really would be worth it if you could get the right treatment.

Hope you get some answers. Stay Strong 🙂

Felicity