fear of "ghosts" and the dark

[bsdfgakrn]

hey

so im quite paranoid about "ghosts" existing

ever since I was young I thought ghosts were real. My cousin scared me about it (hes a dick btw). I read books about ghosts, I did research about ghosts, Ive seen ghost video clips, Ive seen a movie called "ghost"

But yeah the major event that actually affected me the most was when I was younger, I watched a movie called "ghost" about someone who was shot then he becomes a ghost and manages to get his revenge on those who killed him. Ever since I saw that I thought ghosts existed for real and they'd be all around me

If I were exercising in the morning, Id think there is a ghost nearby me

it affects me most when at night because thats when I believe ghosts exist everywhere

people talking about ghosts gives me the shivers

looking at haunted places (for curiosity) seems curious yet I get scared at the same time

this is affecting me

please help

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi bsdfgakrn,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for your post.

Well I could start with telling you that ghosts aren't real but I'm guessing that's not going to put your mind at ease, so instead we'll flip it on it's head and see why they are (or seem to be).

What books and research have you done about ghosts?

When you say the ghost video clips, do you mean the ones of recorded security systems where things like desks move randomly?

What is it you know about them? So far the only stuff that I know about ghosts was that in movies they're supposed to be people that have died that haven't gone to heaven/the white light because they have unresolved issues. I don't know why they linger only at night and in every movie I've seen they don't seem at all harmful - just a bit noisy sometimes when they move furniture; which is kinda weird because they're supposed to walk through walls?

I bet you weren't expecting these questions! But there's a reason for them;- I want to try and see what evidence you know that's making you believe and feel like they are there. Then maybe we can try and challenge it and hopefully make things a bit less scary.

[The_Possum]

Ghosts are definitely real.

It depends why they are here. Sometimes just passing through, sometimes with a message to loved ones, and sometimes they can be scary if they have unsavoury intentions.

I'm not the only one who senses these things. Are you actually sensing presence or is this a built up fear you have without sensing anything significant?

[MsPurple]

I am not sure if ghosts are real or not, but I have had the ghost fear as well. I am not concerned anymore but I know how you feel. For me I tried to tell myself 'if ghosts are real they are not here to harm me. They are hear for their own reason'. I also reminded myself that I was a kind natured person and they had no reason to do anything to me. I know some people believe in them and some don't, but I haven't come to a definite conclusion yet. I haven't seen one so I can't be sure. Maybe try some meditation when you get this fear take over your mind. Meditation helps stop your racing mind. It may be helpful. I would also discuss it with your therapist. They have probably heard this concern all the time. I told my therapist I was always anxious about dying and the after life, and how concerned I was to talk to him about it. He said many clients have the same thoughts, but because no one shares them we don't know.

A suggestion I would make is to avoid watching ghost movies as they seem to be triggering you anxiety. If you struggle to do this, only watch movies with good ghosts in it like Harry Potter.

[bsdfgakrn]

ok I will tell you a bit why I believe ghosts are real

firstly I watched a movie called "ghost" (I cant remember the year it was made in) where a man is shot, he becomes a ghost but only realises it when time comes. He avenges himself by killing the man who shot him and another accomplice

Ever since that watching that I have been paranoid about ghosts existing throughout the year. At times I have done some googling on ghosts and tried watching some videos to know more about them and conquer my fear of them but I guess all that did was made me more paranoid

I've even looked at youtube videos at ghosts spotted on videos and in pictures and oh my god they scare the living daylights out of me

Ive done some research on haunted places in Sydney and some of these areas are very familiar to me (even some high schools in Sydney are haunted). I mean I can just imagine that sort of situation and how scared I would be

Even typing up this post and thinking about ghosts scare me

At night when the lights are off and everyone is asleep I am usually to afraid to come out because I feel there is a ghost in my house and watching me

I mean even as users above of had claimed that ghosts exist, they may not be scary but after loads of research on google and watching youtube videos, it just seems too scary

I had friends recounting experiences with ghosts in the past (and I do not believe they did anything wrong to him)

though just seeing things move around on its own strangely is really scary

unwanted people in a video or photograph is just scary (not alive people in the background)

i go to a high school and I heard rumours from this one teacher that the primary school (which is across the road from my school) is claimed to be haunted as it use to be a nursery (and she got this from a student or teacher at my school I have no idea who)

I do believe ghosts are real based on research and whether or not they are good or bad they just scare me. I can just imagine a normal resident on a surburban street walking and I might think that is a ghost when in reality it is a normal person on a street

Sometimes I even think places where murders occur (such as the lin family house in north epping) will be haunted for sure

although it mainly affects me at night I sometimes think that this could happen during the day as well (if Im with more people I feel safer and that a ghost might ot be near but if Im by myself I would usually think there one)

[The_Possum]

Hey there

Thanks for writing back, it helps me understand where you are coming from.

To be honest, you might be taking things a bit too far, and I think you're almost obsessing over it and have built up a really big fear. In my opinion anything, thoughts or otherwise, that negatively effects your day to day living, really needs to be looked at. It's not great to walk around feeling like this, I imagine it is having a big impact on your quality of life.

If I were you, I would go and have a chat with my GP about this. It's not going to hurt and honestly they are trained to hear and deal with so many things. You're not likely to say anything they haven't heard before.. They are professionals in the business of helping people!

The GP may be able to make some suggestions for you. It could be meditation, it could be seeing a psychologist to work through the fears etc I'm not sure, but sometimes even medication help if it's anxiety based.

I do believe in ghosts but I don't get too caught up in it. I don't research them or YouTube videos etc and I generally don't buy into photos which are often photoshopped. Same with stories, sometimes they are just that.. Stories and spooky tales with the intent to I still fear.

My experience has been feeling a presence after people gave passed mostly family members and friends. If I turn quickly I might see a shadow at the corner of my eye, or feel that they are just around. I had to do a speech once and was panicking, I'm sure my grandmother was there giving me confidence. I've also had a book I'm sure on left on the table that belonged to a family relative appear on my bedside.

Sometimes I dream of people that have passed. That they are laughing at a big feast etc I wake up with a smile knowing they are OK.

These are all things which have occurred through my life and way before I was diagnosed with bipolar late last year so I can't say it's mental health or medication induced.

It doesn't scare me, I feel reassured of their presence, although eerie that they are here, I just hope they are OK and if they are trying to tell me something or a message, I hope I'm understanding it.

Anyway that's my two cents worth. I'd definitely try to steer away from getting overwhelmed by all this sensory stuff of ghosts and such which isn't helping you right now. And I'd go talk to the GP.

It's ok. Trust me. There's a way forward with the right help.

Peace x

[bsdfgakrn]

The Possum

Thank you for your detailed response

If you mind could you please tell me a bit about your experiences with ghosts and how you have coped with that?

Would you recommend me steering away from googling and youtubing ghosts?

Also if I accidentally come across a link to a ghost video (or something similar) when I'm on youtube watching...say something like top 10 simpsons moment they might have top 10 scariest ghost encounters by the same youtuber what would you recommend me do?

I am not a fan of horror movies, mainly because I believe this sort of thing would make me more scared of ghosts

But yeah I really have to thank you for your help

[james1]

Hi bsdfgakrn,

I don't know whether ghosts are real or not, but you are clearly struggling with your fear of ghosts and I do wonder if you are building this fear up for yourself.

Let me give you an example.

A phobia of spiders is also quite common. If your friend was afraid of spiders to the point of having panic attacks, yet he also kept watching videos of spiders or going to spider exhibits and having panic attacks, what would you say?

It can be a weirdly cathartic experience to look at things we fear, but if it's causing us to build up too much fear that it inhibits our daily lives, it's an unhealthy habit that we need to break.

James

[The_Possum]

Hey there

I think I've already described above what my experiences with ghosts are. In terms of coping, well it doesn't really bother me, I see it more as a positive and reassuring thing, if anything their presence calms me (that may sound strange).

My only concern is that they might be trying to tell me something and I miss the point. I can worry a bit about that, but I generally just push it aside and don't really think about it again.

So I'm not concerned or scared by it as you have described.

Yeah I'd definitely be avoiding it, if it appears on YouTube just go search something else, there's heaps of stuff out there, you don't need to sit and look at ghost material all day.

To be honest I never even see any random ghost stuff appear when on YouTube.. Generally I'm there to check out Casey Neistat stunts etc

If you start to avoid the ghost stimuli maybe you will start to forget about it..

If it continues to bother you, I'd seriously see the GP.

Not much fun living like this I'd imagine.. Goodluck x

[CatPxl]

Hey,

I had exactly the same thing. Except to start with it didn't scare me. To start with I just thought they were my friends. I used to talk to them and play with them.

I had a bit of a troubled up bringing so I always used to stay with my sisters to get away from my parents. They were in the teens when I was really young and they loved horror movies. I still get nightmares about the movies and all of the monsters that came with them. I have to check all of the cupboards every time I come home and I have to get my partner to check under the bed before I get in it. My sister came back from camp one day.. around the time photoshop was becoming popular. She edited one of the photos of her classmates to have this terrifying ghost girl floating behind him and put it in the folder of photos and proceeded to show me her camp photos. I was so petrified. All of the things that had I had seen in movies I automatically thought was what they were. I struggled to get to sleep that night and when I woke up she had printed it out and stuck it all over my room. I couldn't sleep by myself for years.

But then I started really reading into spirits and the history of them through different cultures etc and I found love for them again. Like don't get me wrong, you will never catch me walking in the dark alone and I'll still stay up to 3am some nights because I spike myself out about shadows but it gets better. Try buying a salt lamp if you can. They are great for creating positive energy and they provide a dim yellow light so you can keep it on while falling asleep without disturbing your sleep. You can also try talking to them if you won't feel super crazy. They can't talk back and they can't really move or manipulate things in our world often but they are great at listening. It doesn't particularly bother me anymore, I honestly mostly just tell them to leave me alone if I'm not up to it on certain days. It's mostly my own imagination that gets to me these days.

You have a gift, not everyone can see them!