Change and anxiety

[Romy]

Does anyone else find that change in routine causes anxiety flare up? I'm having a few things change in my life: a new job and a new relationship. I'm happy about both of these, they are exciting changes! However, my anxiety flares up when I'm adjusting to it or anticipating the change. I know I just need to ride it out while I'm getting comfortable, just want to know how common this is.

[PamelaR]

Hello Romy

Think we've chatted before.

Yes, my anxiety goes through the roof with change. From working full time to retirement, wow. Talk about elevated heart beats. Thought there was something 'really' wrong with me. Sorry, I should say, thought I was having a heart attack. Having MI is real and it's okay to feel anxious when you're going through change.

It's all about managing it - what do you do when you're triggered?

• Breath slowly
• Distract yourself
• Grounding, mindfulness, meditating, relaxing
• Exercising
• Writing
• Talking here on BB

Be kind to yourself Romy. Things will settle soon.

Kind regards

PamelaR

[Romy]

Hi Pamela!

Yes, I think I spoke to you when I was going on a second date with my now boyfriend hahahaha!

I'm taking a little time adjusting to things. This is my first relationship and I'm anxious about being anxious. I can't really eat when he's around because I'm a little on edge. Also, I just got a new job which I will be starting in a couple of days. Both are really exciting, but I always worry about how I will cope with new things. At the moment I'm just getting through everyday, telling myself I will get better, I will adjust. I've been meditating before bed and getting up and doing things, making sure I don't just sit around and wallow. When I'm busy, I'm happy.

[PamelaR]

Hello Romy

Wow, your life is taking off. Really pleased to hear you're going on a second date. So exciting.

I know what you mean about - being anxious about being anxious. Sounds silly, hey, but it happens to me all the time too. A certain amount of anxiety is actually good for us. It gets us motivated, up, running, doing all those things we need to. And of course, too much anxiety, is overwhelming.

My anxiety comes from a fear of something. In this case it's fear about fear. Something I've learnt is - I don't have to fear, fear.It doesn't have to be. I am learning how to let that fear go. Easy actually because from a rational thought - there is nothing to fear.

I find my energies are better spent on trying to unlearn or change the beliefs I have that make me fearful, e.g. I'm not good enough, I don't do anything right, my skin's too dark, my hair's too thin. Those are hard work. But I'm getting there.

Let us know how your new job goes and how your second date went.

Kind regards

PamelaR

[Romy]

No I mean, last time I spoke to you I had been on the second date. I have been on plenty more and he's now my boyfriend! Hahaha. My psychologist has given me a few strategies to challenge my thoughts, I'm gonna practise this weekend when I have my first shift and go to Melbourne to see my boyfriend. I'll let you know how it all goes!!

[PamelaR]

Super Cool Romy

Hope all goes well for you this weekend. Just remember to slow your breathe (not hold your breathe).