cant get over it..

[Daniel1]

a couple of months back my best friend decided he had had enough of me and told me we're not friends anymore. well that hit me hard and i went into a depression for about 2 months. my friends are the only ppl that hold me together anymore, they help me forget about all the miserable shit in my life. but i was more depressed about the fact that my best friend was ready to leave me behind. anyway after that 2 month depression i went into this really weird feeling for about 3 weeks of complete happiness, hype, over activity and just genuinely being happy about everything. then it dropped again and i was miserable. what pisses me off is that i want to hate this person for leaving me like he did, but i just cant. i cant get over this break up!!! please someone help me get over him so i can try and live a normal life.

[white knight]

Hi Daniel,

Yep, hurts doesn't it. I'm 60yo and had a school friend since 16yo and 2 years ago without notice- never returned my calls. I asked him why and he said "I think friendships drift away often" but my gut feeling is that I'm baggage to him, my emotional struggles I would always mention and have found it hard to - not mention them because my mental illnesses are really important to me.

So how did I move on? By being busy...hobbies, sports etc, keep busy all the time. Also make other friends. This might find you thinking after a while that your old friend wasn't the deep friend you thought he was. And finally, if a person wants to move on from you let them go. give them your blessing and a tip....send them a xmas card every year. That will keep a little spark between you going. You never know, in 20 years time he just might look you up and you can reconnect where it went downhill.

Dwelling on things is often a symptom of depression or some other issue like anxiety. If you think you feel symptoms sneaking into your life see your GP.

Good luck

Tony WK

[marcus_c]

Hi Tony you are so right about eventually realising that the person wasn't much chop in the first place. Daniel I can vouch for this. I am currently going through a breakup, and while it hurts like hell now, and I can't at this moment imagine what it will feel like to be over him, I know when I think back on past relationships that I feel nothing for those men, other than the knowledge that they once were in my life. Time heals is a cliche but its true.