What am i doing?

[Leah1970]

I am a 49 year old woman who gave up everything to help my mother out who has vascular dementia and now i have nothing. I am living off my super to pay the rent. I have absolutely no one to help me. I left a violent marriage 2 years ago and because my name is on the mortgage i don't qualify for assistance. I injured my knee and i am on a waiting list so i can't work. I am at my wits end. I can't afford a solicitor and I am terrified of what will happen to me. I have not one friend or family who can help. I moved up north a year ago to help out with my mother but she's now in care. I have a sister close by but she won't let me stay with her while i find some place to live. I have no way out and it frightens me. I have never felt so alone in my life. I can't even afford to eat. I have nothing at all except the plastic bags that i came here with. I don't understand why people can be so cruel. The pain in my knee never stops. I am ready to give up. I really don't see a way out. I have cried for the last 3 days . I don't know who to turn to. I have not one friend. Domestic violence does that. Please i just want someone to tell me i am worth the struggle.

[Aaronsis]

Hello Leah1970

You are not only worth the struggle you are worth so much more. I am so very sorry that you are going through a really tough time at the moment and I can see from reading your story that you have the biggest caring heart and to be able to support your mother through her time is so wonderful. It is a shame that your sister is not able to help you out, that there are people who are not able to reach back when we need them. I think we have to sometimes think about what perhaps is going on in their life too and that it doesn't mean that they don't care, it just means perhaps that they are at full capacity too and cannot connect or reach back.

That is why coming here is such a wonderful thing to do and it is so great you have reached out for some support today. We are here for you and we care so much. I am not sure if there is a place like the Salvation Army that you could reach out to for some help and support at this time, to help you with some accommodation and even a meal and a place to get your thoughts together?

Please do not give up, I know this is easier said than done but this is a time in your life and should not cost you your life. There are brighter days to come Leah1970 so please hold on.

I hope that you come back to chat some more and that I can give you some support through this time.

Hugs to you

Sarah xxx

[Leah1970]

Thank you so very much for your beautiful words. I hope you know that you as a stranger have made me smile. Thank you. I think what hurts the most is that i had sacrificed so so much and i felt cheated. I know I shouldn't expect anything in return because i do what i do out of love . So much has happened to me in the last 2 years and I'm now at the end of my rope. I have never ever felt so invisible and useless. But yes I believe we have a salvation army here in this small town so i will take your advice. Thank you again for caring. It means a lot xxx

[Aaronsis]

Hey Leah1970

Great to chat to you some more and I totally understand that you do what you do out of love and you don't expect anything in return and that is what makes you such a devine human, however it does hurt when we dont feel appreciated or even when those cant reach out to us and give us a lift up when we need it, it does hurt and I hear how much this is hurting you Leah1970.

I hope that you can reach out to the Salvation Army, they are so very wonderful and are here for this very reason, to give a helping hand when one is in need.

I see you Leah1970 and you are not invisible to me and so not useless at all, you have sacrificed your life for another, to provide care and to help, that is the work of an angel not someone who is useless.

I hope today brings something to make you smile, I am here to chat and to give you support and comfort and I hope that you can see how wonderful you are Leah1970.

huge hugs

Sarah xx

[therising]

Hi Leah1970

Without a single doubt, you are definitely worth the struggle. You're beautiful, sensitive, thoughtful, caring and the list goes on. Folk like you are truly needed in a world of insensitive and thoughtless people. You're a precious gem!

Wondering if you've considered looking into legal aid. It must be incredibly frustrating for you to think that the man who abused you is living in your share of the property. You could definitely do with the money by the sound of it. Talking with someone brilliant from legal aid might give you a multi faceted view of where you stand. I'm no genius in the way of legalities so I don't know whether you could even consider the idea of taking a restraining order out against him as a way of you moving back into the house, with him not being allowed to reside there. As I say, not sure. There may be a lot of 'outside the square' options worth exploring. It may be a huge challenge when it comes to getting the ball rolling in regard to selling and obtaining your share of the house and I'd be surprised if the Salvos don't have some basic legal consultant who could help you look into this, as well as other means of financial support. You'd imagine they've come across some challenges in their time when it comes to the foolish ways of Centrelink.

You're a beautiful person surrounded by irresponsible folk who won't step up when they are called to. The challenge for you is to search for the right people who will. They're out there. Getting in contact with an organisation who deals with domestic abuse might be the way to go, even though you physically left that situation a little while back. Never too late.

Again, you're beautiful!

🙂