Tmay

[Tmay]

I am 60 years old and my marriage is ending. I have nothing without him. I suffer from depression for many years. How do I start over when I have nothing. My husband never hits me but constantly yells at me and I have been walking on egg shells around him for years so I don’t get into trouble from him. Where do I go, what do I do, where can I get help...I have been so dependent on him for the last 20 years, I feel lost. How do I go on from here... I just don’t know what to do... I feel sick and having terrible headaches through stress. Has anyone else been where I am today?

[geoff]

Hello Tma, and a warm welcome to the site.

I'm sorry for the situation you are now in but you need to live a life where you are feeling free and able to do what you want without anyone dominating you.

If you can google this 'housing for elderly' then perhaps something will appear that you like.

Alternatively, you can go to Anglicare, they were an enormous help to me and may provide housing with furniture for you.

Even though you were dependent on your husband, quietly there could be much you have learnt from him, although you couldn't do yourself, but make a list of what you feel you deserve to take and once you find somewhere then organise you can take while he's not at home.

Please ask any questions you may be worried about.

Geoff.

[Croix]

Dear Tmay~

I'd like to join Geoff in welcome you here to the Forum. It's a good place to come for understanding and ideas from others. Geoff had some good suggestions.

One of the things you said was:

"My husband never hits me but constantly yells at me and I have been
walking on egg shells around him for years so I don’t get into trouble
from him."

Which is simply not right, nobody should have to live their life so they don't get into trouble with another, it needs to be equal if you are to stand any chance of a happy and secure life.

Can I suggest, if you have not already done so, you contact 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732) and tell them what has been happening and how you have been treated. They are used to such things and may well be able to give practical advice or point you at organizations that can.

Constant depression is a huge burden to bear too, can I ask if you are having medical support for it? If not then seeing you GP in a long consultation may be a good idea. I mention this as I never started to get better until I did.

These thoughts above may help, please let me know what you think

I look forward to hearing from you again

Croix