Deat Tj~
I'm glad you met Sophie_M as she gives good advice. I do feel sorry you have had to go so long in getting a second response, please be assured it is nothing to do with you personally, or the subject of your post - far from it. It is simply our system does not always work as we would like, a great nuisance all round.
OK, I too have the same illnesses, PTSD, bouts of depression and ongoing anxiety, however the causes are a long time ago and I've recovered to the point where I have been able to resume my past loving relationship with my wife and family, work and gain satisfaction from it, and can give support as well as be supported. All this from someone who was suicidal.
I'm going on about me to give you an idea there can be a light at the end of the tunnel, not only for your current relationship with your wife, but all in all a better future with symptoms under control (well mostly anyway:)
Actually I'm not surprised your wife has reached a stage where romance and intimacy are not on the agenda. Her own first though was matters were her fault, then after being full briefed realized that my actions were symptoms, not just me being selfish, totally wrapped up in myself, wanting to be alone, and when approached being dismissive, surly, angry or resentful.
She stuck by me, and no there was no intimacy. When you think about it many people need the right relationship, one where they feel cherished, can rely upon their partner who can be a comfort, and generally feel secure for intimacy. I'm not sure of the details of your relationship , but if like mine then not having the reassurance of intimacy at the moment may simply be the unfortunate result of your condition.
Do you think I might be on the right track?
My wife had support, not only her GP but more importantly her mum, who helped in practical matters with the family, and gave her ongoing care and a person to talk frankly with. It made a huge difference for her. May I ask if your wife has something similar? Trying to cope with a person with the usual symptoms on one's own is horribly hard.
I did try, I knew perfectly well I was terrible to live with, and when I was calmer did give tokens of appreciation, even if only an unasked for cuppa.
Over time with meds and therapy I returned to being able to offer my partner the things she knew from before, became reliable, supportive and fun. It worked out OK due to the tenacity and strength of my wife whom I owed a huge debt.
Is this any help?
Croix
.
