Memory Issues and Lifestyle Changes - (First Time poster! )

[FrancesG07]

Hi there,

I've finally worked up the courage to post here - Yay!

I am in my mid twenties and have battled with mental health issues all my life, however only sought help at 19, at which point I was diagnosed with PTSD and OCD. I have decided to post to this forum to be able to connect with others who, from what I can gather, may have an understanding of some of what I am going through at present. It seems like such an amazing online community here.

I was hospitalised a few weeks ago for the first time, due to depression and anxiety. I have struggled in silence for many years, and have now (following being in hospital) been plugged into a great support network of mental health nurses, a wonderful psychologist, a nurse practitioner and my local GP.

Leading up to going into hospital I had a lack of sleep and an inability to deal with encroaching memories resurfacing relating to my post traumatic stress disorder. I was having memories triggered by senses (touch, smell, sound etc) and would become cripplingly emotional and anxious. This was in addition to nightmares.

I feel like my sleep, my 'flashbacks' and my heightened senses (fight or flight instinct) have been better with medication and I have amazing professionals helping me. However, day to day I am becoming impatient with myself.

With my work, I need to be alert and 'on-the-ball' (I really don't like to use that term, though!). I have others in my care, and head up a team of volunteers, while also studying full time - I was quite a busy person. I am struggling with the guilt of having made the decision to cut back on work for a while (less hours, and delegate a lot more) to find my feet again and deal with medication changes & time to work through things with my psychologist. However, the primary reason for this is my memory!

I would love to hear how other people have found making changes to their schedules and lives, and coping with memory issues (if anyone else has had any). This week I forgot my phone number and email, a few weeks ago I had no recollection of a conversation I had had. I am double booking myself with appointments etcetera, forgetting day to day tasks and peoples names that I interact with on a weekly basis.I have been told it is common with depression and it will improve as my mental health does. However, would love to hear from anyone who can relate, or who has some tips or advice.

Many Thanks in advance! I am looking forward to being a part of this online community.

[Croix]

Dear FrancesG07~

Memory loss and poor concentration can be a real problem, at least in the shorter term, as a result of PTSD, depression and anxiety. It seems at the time a very real threat and so I'm pleased you have come here to see what has happened to others.

I have the above as an ex-policeman and have found in the past much as you, however as time went on I improved. I can't say exactly back to where I was before, but OK. I passed a tertiary course, so things are good enough, though I do rely upon my smartphone a lot.

I think you will find the following older thread by another policeman (who went back to work) helpful:

Forums / PTSD & Trauma / Poor concentration due to PTSD

Pacing yourself is only sensible, with both work and study it is pretty easy to take on more than is wise. I studied part-time (without working at the same time) and found that was enough. While everyone's capacity is different the tendency to bite off more than one can chew is pretty common, with results in increased stress, more flashbacks, more symptoms and more stress.

Talking of flashbacks, my own situation improved out of sight, and while some things still trigger me they are a lot less frequent and my reactions a lot less.

The short answer is with a modicum of luck you can look forward to a decent life.

Croix

[geoff]

Hello Frances, it does take a great deal of courage to post your first comment, so well done and a warm welcome to you.

I also have OCD and have had PTSD but pleased that you have all these support people to rely on, that's a terrific start after suffering in silence.

There is no reason why you should feel guilty about cutting back your hours with your job, but obviously, know that money pays bills and hope that this doesn't concern you that much.

Making changes to your schedule can quite easier affect your memory, and trying to cope with PTSD, OCD, anxiety and depression will certainly make it worse, remember there's a lot you are trying to cope with.

Carry a diary with you and write down your appointments, phone numbers and other important details, like your email, just don't write down the all details so other people will be able to read it or establish a code word which will tell you what you want.

Having a code is probably an OCD habit because that's what I do.

My Best Wishes.

Geoff.

[Doolhof]

Hi FrancesGO7,

I too welcome you to this community. I see yo have already had caring and supportive replies from Croix and Geoff.

Memory loss is something I am very familiar with, on top of my mental health issues I had chronic fatigue that really did my head in for a while. When I had to drive somewhere, I had to have a note in the car with me to remind me where I was going! I always found my way home so that was a bonus!

Keeping track of appointments on your phone or in a diary helps. I learnt I had to be a little bit humble at times and apologise to people if I had double booked or forgot to attend something.

Delegating at the moment is a way for you to cope and for others to gain more experience and learn greater skills themselves.

It may be necessary for you to step back a little until you feel better adjusted. The main thing is that you have the help, you now recognise there is a problem and you can find solutions, ways and means of doing things differently.

Guilt and shame are depleting emotions unless you are able to use them for good, to recognise you feel this way and learn to deal with them helpfully.

Sounds like you have an amazing support team! Be open to learn all you can from them, learn to be the best person you can be right now with what you have and that is the most you can do for yourself and others.

Cheers to you from Dools