Hi, I'm new here and wanting advice.

[Mikego]

Hi everyone. I feel I'm continually dealing with lapses of quite intense anxiety and at a bit of a loss with how to treat it/whether there is something to treat.

I live in Melbourne with my loving partner and 3 year old daughter (with another one on the way). We live in the city in a bit of a rough area and I am constantly feeling under threat on. I am 6 foot 5 and hardly the most vulnerable looking person, however, I feel extremely uncomfortable around those that strike me as 'dodgy' looking. This often makes me go silent at home as I sit with my painful anxiety, making me difficult for my family to deal with. We are not in a financial position to move at the moment, and my partner is unwilling due to her support network.

I often dip into the world of meditation and mindfulness only often to come out of these experiences worse - i find this extremely frustrating as it puts me off well being altogether. My old-fashioned upbringing of tough love may be influencing this for the worse.

I'm also feeling very afraid of having a new baby to deal with - added to that my parents (I have a difficult relationship with my Dad) from the UK are visiting and I want to provide a happy environment. Everything just seems too much and I often just want to live all by myself and shut everyone out.

And help or dialogue would be most appreciated.

[Just Sara]

Hi Mike and welcome to our caring community;

Your situation sounds difficult for sure, especially dealing with anxiety on top. These issues are of course a natural occurrence in life, but it's how we cope that defines us. Anxiety's a real spanner in the works making matters larger than life, which you're obviously acutely aware of.

I'm wondering if you've been diagnosed or talked with your GP about how you're feeling; you haven't mentioned. There's anti anxiety and anti depressant medication and therapies to help you cope, and you can of course purge your pent up worries and fears on here. We've all benefited from our time on the forum, that's why we stay to help others like yourself.

With anxiety, meditation might not help. This practice goes into the subconscious where many of our fears reside. Even though you're not consciously aware of it, the visualisations and feelings may trigger you.

Mindfulness however, if done properly to suit you, can really improve stress responses. The main objective is to stay grounded and aware of your surroundings so you don't disassociate from the reality of your environment. This means going into your head too much trying to deal with thoughts, worry and perceptions.

Please keep writing ok. It helps to rid yourself of 'words' floating around your head and out fears. I look forward to talking more.

Kind thoughts;

Sez