Hello everyone!

[BrianZ]

Hey everyone!

My names Brian and this is my first time posting on the forum but I do know the community is incredibly supportive and caring.

I've been battling depression and anxiety since about 15 or 16. In recent times over the last couple of years my depression has been at its peak, and everyday is a challenge on its own.

In a nutshell, I've always been the ultimate introvert and I've done things a little differently. I was never close with my family and my relationship with my parents is non existent these days. I began working full time at about 19, instead of going to uni, choosing to pursue music teaching and building my own business.

Career wise business has never been better as last year I moved out of home for the first time, got accepted into the conservatorium of music, finally launched my website and I'm continuing to improve as a musician.

However my personal life and own inner battles continue to weigh me down and I find it very difficult to relate to anyone even my girlfriend and closest mates.

I hope that by sharing my story throughout this forum will help others as well, not just myself. I've been very strong on the importance of increasing mental health awareness as in integrated mental fitness heavily into my own music teaching.

Thank you everyone for doing what you do! Stay strong and looking forward to chatting to you all soon!

[geoff]

Hello Brian, welcome and thanks for posting your comment.

Working full time can be a great choice, that's exactly what I wanted to do rather than go to uni as my parents wanted me to do, those were 3 difficult years to achieve what.

Your ambition in being a musician seems to be doing well, but there is a small problem that's stopping you from progressing further, as you say you suffer from this illness and sometimes it can become awkward talking to your g/friend as well as your mates, simply because they see a man doing well in his career, so he couldn't have any other problems, but do know it's quite easy to pretend to those people you love making them believe that, hey, I am suffering.

There have been professional musicians who do hide their depression and try and express it by the songs they create or happen to play so no one knows their reason for feeling this way.

Brian as creative and imaginative as you may be with music which could soothe you while playing, it doesn't solve the problem your trying to push away because there will be certain triggers that may begin all of a sudden and in unusual situations which indicates you need to talk with someone who understands what you're saying.

If you are under 25 you can also contact Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800 by phone, web chat or online.

Please ask any question/s you want to.

Take care.

Geoff.

[Summer Rose]

Hi Brian

Welcome to the forums. Thank you for having the courage to share your story.

I’m so sorry that you’ve been experiencing depression and anxiety for years. It’s tough, I know, particularly as a young person without a lot of family support.

I’m wondering if you’ve ever sought professional help? I ask only because with the right treatment many people do recover from these conditions. I would start (if you haven’t already) with a visit to your GP.

Congratulations on your wonderful life choices and business and musical success. It takes a lot of courage to follow your dreams, you should be very proud of yourself.

Kind thoughts to you

[Mark Z.]

Hi Brian,

Welcome to the forum.

Your achievements are amazing, and your self-awareness is great. It's absolutely right to prioritise your mental health.

You mentioned that you're introvert, you do things differently, and you don't have close relationship with your family, that's all right. We're all different and there's no good or bad, everyone is unique.

When you say you find it very difficult to relate to anyone even your girlfriend and closest mates, do you want to share more details about what happened and what could be the reason from your opinion?

Mark