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Gender Reveal Depression

Meg_X
Community Member

I’m 8 months pregnant and devastated that I’m having a girl. We tried to conceive for a long time and the only thing that got me through was the thought of my precious son at the end. The day we found out it was a girl (we found out at 10 weeks) I hated being pregnant and I’ve found no joy in this pregnancy since! Some days it’s so bad I can’t even get out of bed. I have no desire to name her or do a nursery for her so my husband has had to do it all.

I have no idea why I feel like this and I can’t stop these feelings. The thought of being a girl mom fills me with dread... all the hair braiding, temper tantrums, outfit changes, ballet lessons ect ect are just not what I wanted for the rest of my life.

Everyone keeps telling me I don’t know what type of girl I’m having.. she could be a tomboy, she could be really sporty.. but I know my luck in life and she will be the girliest girl around.

Im sorry for all the negativity but I have been carrying this around with me for months. I just don’t see a way out! I’ve asked for professional help but unless I can pay $70 a session there isn’t any help out there. I’m hoping someone here has been through the same thing and can relate.

Please don’t me and think badly of me. I know this is not how you are supposed to feel and that I should just be happy I’m having a healthy baby

12 Replies 12

quirkywords
Community Champion
Community Champion

meg x

hello.

just wondering how you are going?,

Probbaly very busy.

Take care

Quirky

meg,

Injust wanted to thank Mickey for her helpful post .

Mickey, welcome to the forum and thank you for using your first post to share your experience with others.

I think when we are honest about our feelings others know they are not alone.

Apparently pink for girls and blue for boys is cultural and came about according to one source, because blue was the colour that protected children against demons!

Thanks again and welcome to the forum.

Quirky

DixieKong
Community Member

Hi Meg,

I was the same but the opposite gender. I wanted a girl more than anything. My friends all had girls, I am a massive girly girl and sparkley shoes make my heart melt. When I found out at 15 weeks that it was a boy I cried and cried and cried. I had a friend tell me that they couldn’t be friends with me anymore because I was having a boy. I was excluded by them. I didn’t want dinosaurs or soccer or cars. I grew up in a house of girls, I didn’t know what to do with a boy!

I wish I could tell you that when he was born it all changed, but it didn’t. I remember waking up at 3am once and thinking “all of this, for a boy?”

my son is 2.5 years old now and I would not trade him for the world. I love him and all the “boy” activities and toys and truly, I don’t mind if I have a girl in the future or not. This little boy has shown me that something that I thought would be incredibly disappointing turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened to me. I still see those sparkly shoes and sometimes feel a twang of pain in my heart but I love the scuffed navy blue joggers more than anything. Oh, and guess which “friends” aren’t a part of my life anymore?! Hehe

hope you are doing ok xo