First step...finally.

[Jb12345]

Hi all

I'll get right into it then. Im almost 29 and basically have suffered from depression since I was about 14 and the last 6 or 7 years, its close friend anxiety has joined in as well. I'm generally the life of the party, funniest guy in the room but I have suffered from this in silence, have never told anyone apart from my current girlfriend who is supportive and understanding. I recently opened up to another person as they suffered from something similar and I thought I could help them with my experience and we were a good support network for each other until one day said I was too much and needed a break from me giving no real reason (which is driving my anxiety wild as you would imagine) it was a big kick in the guts. My life has been a pretty good one, heathy family, lots of friends, enjoy a few hobbies etc but with the flick of a switch I can instantly hate myself, causing more anxiety, which in turn can grow into anger and embarrassment. Its basically a daily battle of which I either win or lose and im honestly just tired of it. Its exhausting to do this day in day out. I've tried different lifestyle changes over the years, nothing seems to really kick it for good. Im just tired and want to chat with people who have some sort of idea what I'm going through, as it is such a bizarre and misunderstood disease.

Cheers

[Croix]

Dear Jb12345~

Welcome here to the Forum. It can be very worrying to talk abut how you feel, particularly to a bunch of stranger, however an awful lot of us have or are recovering from depression and anxiety and understand your situation.

Wearing that mask is something well known to us too, seems a fine way to cope, but one ends up more isolated and feeling less worthy in time.I'm glad you were able to tell your girlfriend, and glad she is a support, that make a huge difference.

Trying to help someone else can be very tricky, and while some experiences may be similar others may not, and if it doe not work out at least you tried, it shows you have a caring nature.

A suitable healthy lifestyle, wiht nutrition, exercise, sleep and enjoyable hobbies is part of the remedy, but only part. You do this now.

Really the only way I found to improve properly long-term is to get medical support, you need to open up to a doctor as well as your girlfriend, get a proper diagnosis and see what happens from there.

Therapy and meds may be needed, which is not as limiting as you might think. It took a fair while but my medication suits me and works quite well, and the various therapies I've had have left me in a pretty good place.

That daily battle can be overcome.

So what do you think?

Croix