Female "Functional" Alcoholism.

[Emelcee]

Good evening!

I'd like to reach out to other females in late 20s / early 30s who struggle with alcoholism, but still manage to function (still have a career, family etc).

I need support. And I'm sure others do too. 🙂

7 years ago I rarely drank, but I was depressed & anxious.

For the first two years I unknowingly started self medicating with a "knock off drink to relax".

Over those two years, a knock off drink turned into 2-5 drinks, 5-7 nights a week.

I did seek help from my GP and a psych who recommended I start an anti-depressant.

The anti-depressant helped, but I continued to drink. Essentially, one counter-acted the other and I thought I was "fine".

5 years on, I am still on the lowest dosage of my anti-depreesant, drinking everyday & 50 odd kilos heavier.

I hate what I'm doing to myself, and have tried to stop drinking, and started dieting an uncountable amount of times.

I know I should seek professional help. But I guess this is my first step: admitting it's a problem. 😞

[Croix]

Dear Emelcee~

Welcome here to the Forum, I'm sure many people here can relate exactly to how you feel and your experience. It's great you have seen the situation, and are reaching out. Sadly one does not always realize one has a dependency on alcohol until it is well established and a way of life, then despite a desire to stop it can seem just about impossible.

Not only does motivation fade as things get hard, but the original problems that led to drink as a coping mechanism still remain.

It really is a case of needing help, and I'd like to suggest you seek out a support group to help you. With the support of those that have gone, or are going though, the journey to abandon alcohol, plus your GP and psych looking after your depression I suspect you will find it a better and more successful approach.

If oyu ring our 24/7 Help Line on 1300 22 4636 they should be able to steer you towards services in your area.

It can be beaten. May I ask if you have family or friends to help you with this too?

Croix

[Quercus]

Hello Emelcee and welcome to the forums.

I saw your post earlier but had to go to work. To be honest I am stunned noone has posted to say they relate. I'm a little older (33) and I don't drink at all. In some ways I feel thankful for my illnesses. The meds I take mean I shouldn't drink. So I don't.

But... Ah the but.... If alcohol was a choice I would be like the many other women I know who self medicate with booze. I can't so I self medicate with food and binge eating.

My antidepressant and ADHD can only do so much. Food, alcohol, gambling, drugs, smokes.... You name it what we use to cope and relax becomes a habit and then an addiction. And my goodness an addiction is very very hard to break.

It's even harder when you're not obviously hurting yourself or others. When you are still able to function. Plus others don't encourage you to quit. If you have a bit every night sometimes people say oh come on it won't hurt to have ONE.

I'm waffling sorry. My point is when you are ready the resources are out there. There are the obvious ones like Alchoholics Anonymous but also there are online addiction courses too if a public meet up is intimidating. A quick google search will find so many.

Medication alone doesn't help. Yes the meds help us feel more stable but the underlying causes are still there eating away at us. Therapy does help even if it takes time and commitment. You posted here which is brave so perhaps you are ready speak about it?

Good on you. It's never easy to put yourself out there publicly. I agree your story will help many others reading quietly.

Nat

[geoff]

Hello Emelcee, sometimes it's not easy to admit that you have a drinking problem, but it's common for 1 drink to lead onto 6 or 7 drinks for a couple of days to 7 days a week and before you know it becomes an addiction.

Antidepressants ( AD) will help with your depression but won't stop you from drinking, and we have to remember that alcohol is a depressive, sure the first couple of drinks make you feel relaxed but when you keep drinking then it can become a problem.

There is some type of medication that will stop your urge to drink, I've had it a long time ago, so ask your doctor what it is, I can't name it as it's not allowed on this forum, it works, but only if you want to stop, otherwise it's a waste of money.

If you decide to do this then you will need to alter your daily routine and if you want help, then please get back to me.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[Birdy77]

Dear Emelcee,

I want you to know that you are not alone.

Self-medicating with alcohol is something with which I am extremely familiar, so I can really empathise with what you are going through.

It's so hard because it does make me feel better in that moment, but then later, or the next day, i feel worse and not just from the hangover, but from knowing how I am damaging my body and also it does my mental health no favours either as I spiral into self-loathing and feelings of depression. Fun times.

Emelcee, I have recently come across a book called This Naked Mind. You can download the first 40 pages for free. It might be worth having a squiz at it and see what you think (if you haven't already heard of it). I really like her down to earth style.

There have been many forum users post threads just like yours, and have sought support here, in the last few weeks I've talked to several, so please don't feel like you're the only one.

Thank you for bravely posting your fears and feelings.

🌻birdy