Hello there.
My first posting, hope you're all having a lovely day, or at least that there is one thing lovely in your day 🙂
I have dealt with anxiety
my whole life but I have really only started to tackle this in the last year or
so after a breakup with my last partner. She also had anxiety/depression but
much more severe, and at the end of that relationship I felt I had in a way
taken on a lot of this depression, had stopped talking to people and making new
friends. Over the last couple of years I have made an enormous effort to make
friends and reconnect with people. Sometimes it has been very very hard but I
feel in a place now where I have a decent amount of nice friends and even
acquaintances that I can see every now and then. I have also seen a
psychologist and been on a few medications and tried mindfulness, yoga, and a
lot of reading about these issues. I am still struggling though.
I have ongoing anxiety, and have a problem
with insomnia which becomes worse when I’m stressed. And this spirals into
worrying about looking tired and not wanting to go out, and more anxiety, and
more insomnia, you know the drill!
I have had a terrible crush on someone for
a long while now. But I think I have finally worked out that the person does not
have an interest in me, and perhaps I don’t even think we would be good
together. While this may be a good thing to realise, having realised this I
have felt just terrible over the last few days, dealing with residual feelings
of attraction and rejection. Almost like I have broken up with someone, and
like I will never be with anyone and there is something wrong with me. I feel
terribly lonely. I started reading the forums and it made me feel a little like
I wasnt alone in this kind of feeling, so that is why I decided to post today.
Another thing I really struggle with is
social media. It seems mandatory to use it these days and I feel I would have
missed out on a lot of events and planning with my friends if I was not on it.
But it has often descended into an obsession of constant checking and
rechecking, I get anxious whenever I post or message someone on there, going
over and over in my head whether I have said the right thing/how I could have
said something better/whether the joke I made may be taken as an insult, etc. I
feel like social media should make connecting easier but it makes it harder for
me. Does anyone else have this ridiculous problem?! How do you deal with it?
