Anxiety and depression

[Tib]

Hi

I have never used a forum before.

I am 69 years old and have suffered from anxiety and depression off and on all my life. 

I run a small business on my own that's not doing so well. I worry about the future if there is one at my age. I'm tired of worrying about finances and if I will have enough to support myself if I happen to live too long. I'm  tired of dealing with the world and it's ups and downs. I live alone, I isolate, I don't socialise. My business takes all my energy. When I am working I feel fine, when I stop depression sinks in and everything feels pointless.

I have a son, daughter in law and grandchildren but they don't live nearby. I would like to visit them more often and for longer periods of time but it's expensive because they don't have room for visitors and I have to stay at a hotel. I am missing out on my grandchildren, to them I am only an occasional visitor. 

I feel like I should be grateful but I'm not. I have never felt that life is a gift. It just seems like one long long trial you have to get through somehow and which I always have, but for how much longer.

[Sophie_M]

Hey Tib, 
 
A big welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing your story here. We are so glad you've taken the step to reach out here, you are never alone with this. We can hear you've got a lot on your plate running a small buisness, it can be isolating when work takes up a majority of our time.

We're glad you are connecting with your grandchildren but we understand it can be difficult when our family lives far away. The way you are feeling is valid, with the stress of life it is totally understandable to feel that life can be a trial at times. We hope you know that the Beyond Blue counsellors are here for you and would welcome your call or online chat, any time it would help you to speak to someone.  
 
We’re sure you’ll hear from our community soon, but in the meantime here’s a few of articles we thought you might like, particularly relating to burn out from work. We’re hoping some of them can bring you a bit of hope or new ideas: 

• How to support your mental health while working 

• Help while working and experiencing poor mental health    

• Reaching out: support groups and useful phone numbers 

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 It is wonderful that you have been able to reach out for support here on the forums. You never know who might read this thread and feel less alone in their own experience.  

Kind regards, 

Sophie M