New to forum: desperate to help my husband

Spunks_wife
Community Member

Hi everyone,

As the title suggest, this is my first time posting and I am desperate to help my husband of almost 2 years.  My hubby has had 4 TIA's (mini-strokes) and suffers short term memory loss.  He is unable to find a job at aged 50, has tried starting 2 businesses that he is very qualified in, one has folded and the latest is about to as it is costing us and as I only work school terms, the pressure financially is great.  My husband, who was a single dad with sole custody when we met, has been abandoned in the most awful of ways by his daughter, and she has proceeded to bad-mouth him to anyone who will listen, destroying any relationship he has had with family and friends.  His daughter was his life, he gave everything in the divorce to his ex to keep his daughter and now she is doing her best to destroy him emotionally.  His blood pressure is on the rise again, he is sleeping really long hours and his anxiety levels are at an all time high.  His memory is getting worse, and today I received a text when his only stable students cancelled this weeks classes, that he felt like a failure 😞  I am studying full-time and working as many hours as I can to support us, but I am tired...I get in trouble when I remind him of conversations (and I know he doesn't mean it) but it's so hard...all the time...and getting worse.  What do I do?  I love him so much, and want him to find peace in himself, but he is so angry, depressed, anxious, physically breaking things in anger...suggestions and advice please...I don't know how to help and I want to so much...thanks for reading...

10 Replies 10

I know it's been a long time since I posted my plea...but life has become increasingly difficult and my strategies for coping are not quite meeting my needs...with regards to your comment about two-sides to a story I couldn't agree more...however, his family and now my children believe his daughter's lies and now my own daughters won't visit to stay with me unless I leave him...they tell me that his daughter has told them exactly what he is like and they pray he is not testing me that way! I've lost my children now because of his daughters vindictive behaviour...she wants to end my marriage and reunite her parents...and she doesn't care who she destroys along the way...my soul and heart are so empty...my husband is now medicated and under the care of a psychiatrist and psychologist...but he is also sad that no one in his family supports him...they sit on the fence and embrace his daughter and her accusations...which in turn, fuels his feelings of abandonment...honestly, it's all too much...I just don't understand the meaning of family anymore 😢