Hi La la,
Ok, I am going to be super up front and direct about this.
I feel really bad about your situation as I can only imagine what you have gone through to get to this point . The sadness , the dramas , the heartache , the sense of guilt, shame, anxiety about what to do, about what NOT to do.
I feel 3 things need to happen pretty quickly and intensively for your son:
1. He needs his anxiety treated aggressively
2. He needs to get back to school as school refusal is a slippery slope
3. You and any other family members need guidance in developing management skills to help him as it is really hard work.
So… where to from here ?
I hope that you have a great GP who can guide you to a great psychologist and child / adolescent psychiatrist. I think your son needs a proper evaluation and diagnosis and treatment plan. ( Make sure it's anxiety and not aspergers or something else for example)
He also needs someone ( GP or therapist or case worker) to manage his back to school plan. This involves managing the logistics of exactly how this happens - looking at the timing of when he goes and for how long each time, and who he reports to at the school in case of this that or the other…
If you have a Headspace centre near you , please drop in there and see what they can offer as they usually have some experience with this sort of thing:
https://www.headspace.org.au/
If you don’t have a GP, you can find one here:
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/find-a-professional
Whatever you do , just start doing it now and keep going . DO NOT GIVE UP! Keep searching for help as getting your son some relief from his anxiety is really important and getting back into education is such an important goal. Ring helplines - Beyond Blue or kids helpline (1800 55 1800) if you get stuck.
Thanks for writing into us ! I hope I haven’t overwhelmed you. I wanted to validate your sense of urgency about this. Your mothers sense about this is 100% spot on !!
Here is another helpful link: https://www.kidsmatter.edu.au/mental-health-matters/school-refusal
