Please forgive me, this is all new to me so I will try not to ramble.
About 4 months ago my husband took voluntary redundancy from work, a decision made because he was unhappy with the job and working away every other week. He wanted to be home more and more engaged with the family. Since then he has only picked up little bits of agency work but ironically it has meant that he away from home even more. He has been incredibly stressed over the lack of work and his need to earn money, but I work part time and we are not destitute.
I am trying to be supportive but everything I say ends in an argument. He is so defensive that everything is an attack and its starting to wear me down. I am trying to not let this affect family life, but I am tired of trying to hold everything together. When he is away I am normal mum and when he comes home, he isn't engaging with the children. He just goes on his computer or xbox and hides. And when I try to talk to him we end up having a massive argument and i cant protect the children from hearing it.
Yesterday was a crunch day, another outside issue pushed him to breaking point and he snapped. He just walked out, no phone, no word of where he was going and for the first time I was afraid he wasn't going to come back. When I eventually found him, he started screaming at me which reduced me tears, in front of the children, but I couldn't leave him. He then just burst into tears and we were able to talk a little bit about it. He seems ok today, not angry just uninterested and unengaged and has now gone back to bed. I have never doubted the strength of my marriage until now and I wont give on without a fight, but I wonder. I feel that I am drowning at the moment, I cant save myself never mind anyone else.
How do I help him?
Thanks for listening/reading
