Hi there

[Guest_345]

Hi my name is Shereen and I just joined as my last resort, I have been lonely and struggling how to deal with my husband who refuse to seek help, we used to be best friends best lovers best couples he used to treat me so well and I love to pieces , for the last 12months he changed he is withdrawn he is not interested in me physically or sexually I don't feel like a women anymore, he hardly talk to me and hardly make a nice comment, he thinks I'm like his worst night mare I'm struggling to cope with it , I cry every night in my bed and I pray to god this will pass but it's not as he refuse to get help I'm falling a part I have beautiful two boys who they are our life, I'm hurting so badly emotionally but I don't want to destroy my family and I want to support my husband because I know if it was me he will be there for me. I decided to join this group tonight to seek your help and advice and I'm sorry for the long post

[BballJ]

Hi Shereen,

Firstly, welcome to the forums.

Sorry to read what you and your partner are going through. I need to ask when you say he refuses to seek help, do you mean as in marriage counselling or help for himself for a mental health concern? Just want to clarify so I can try to give you the best advice possible.

Please, post back as much as you like, we are always happy to talk.

My best for you and your partner,

Jay

[Guest_345]

Hi jay

he refused to get help for either of them, he giving up on our marriage, like not interested anymore he said he doesn't care anymore and he refuse to seek help for him self as I know him really well he used to be such a happy person then we start having issues with his older son from his first marriage which is ongoing issue as we have our differences about it , then my husband lost his dad and he is having a health Issues, he thinks I'm the one with mental issue he is not affectionate about us anymore he just doesn't care I don't know even if he still love me.i really don't know how to deal with him or can I do to help him to seek help, he sees me as his enemy at the moment and I'm so confused by it because I always tried my best with him and still are . I also had a chat with his family about it and he got very upset and told me that not my business to go and discuss his issues with his brother, I feel like our love is lost and I'm the only one trying to keep this boat floating

[BballJ]

Hi Shereen,

It is very hard to get someone help when they outright refuse it, you can only lead a horse to water but cannot make them drink. It is one of these things unfortunately where you can only keep gently asking him to seek help, what is his response when you suggest marriage counselling. You are doing the right things and speaking to his family, I know he didn't like but sometimes you need to engage in conversation with other people who are close to him to try and get him to see the light and seek the help he so rightly deserves.

I would suggest having a read on these forums in the supporting someone section, simply go to the top of the page where it says "The facts" and scroll down to where it says supporting someone and have a read through there, you may find more useful information as well.

My best,

Jay