Depression

[Haveachat2u]

My partner drives me up the wall. He has depression, it never goes away. I’m leaving him once the lease is up. He thinks 30 minutes of work in two days is hard work! He sweeps the floor in the house or mops a floor or something like that! I work the equivalent of full time to support us! He partly has depression because he won’t get a job or do anything! I burn out because he sits on his butt collects Centrelink and watches old movies or plays computer games! When I’m burnt out it gives me depression! I actually asked for extra work tonight to just get out of the house to get away from him! He’s like I can’t find work! If he truly wanted to work he would find it because I did. You make looking for work your job and the first one you get is usually horrible. You stay there for a year get a reference then you move on after done your time. He is applying for jobs that pay at least $40-$70 an hour! Its not going to happen you need experience first! So his basically thinking about the past worked up about people who died years ago and thinking about everyone that has wronged him wanting to get revenge. Because he won’t let go of his past his lost his future and loosing me, his present and future. I wish I could walk out right now but I have to wait for the lease to end. It’s driving me nuts! On Christmas Day I worked to pay the bills he promised to cook me a dinner and go for a drive later on. Nothing happened! No presents no nothing! He was pining over his dead grandparents and farther and according to him I had no right to complain! So yeah it’s over. I’m sick of him! His depression killed our relationship!

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

There is a big difference between depression, attitude and laziness.

whenever I describe my ex wife to others they say "sounds like she had depression ". Nope, sheer laziness.

A bad attitude might fit for your partner on xmas day. If he pined for his dad he could do so...while he cooked you xmas dinner!. You are being taken advantage of.

As you mind is made up I'd advise to move rooms, distance yourself, visit friends alone and see if there is change.

Take care of you.

TonyWK

[Doolhof]

Hi Haveachat2u,

It certainly does sound like you have enough of the depression your partner is suffering from. I am wondering if he is receiving any help for his depression?

It can be very hard to know if he is lazy and unconcerned or if his depression is so intense at present he is unable to move on or do the thigs he desires to do.

Recently my depression had me feeling almost incapacitated. All I could think of was a permanent end to life. Thankfully my Dr put me in hospital so I was safe and changed my medications. I was incapable of doing anything much at all for a long time.

I did not want to live like that. I did not want to be that person. Without the Drs help I would still be in the same place.

So if your partner is just lazy and uncaring or if he is in a really horrid place mentally right now I don't know.

How long do you have before the lease expires? Would you consider dragging your partner off to see a Dr before you leave? He may not be able to take himself to an appointment right now.

Mental health issues can be devastating for those experiencing them and for those who live with people suffering from them.

Wishing both of you all the best.

Cheers from Dools