At a loss of how to help my mother who constantly lies

[Lette]

Hello all I'm new to this and a bit nervous about laying all this bare. My mother is always struggled with her mental health. She has been diagnosed with depression, anxiety and had numerous breakdowns over the years. Our problem is that she constantly lies about everything and especially about her health. She lies to health professionals and we truely think that she believes these lies. We are even in belief that she made up a cancer diagnosis and had numerous prophylactic surgeries( it's a very long story). She is currently very fragile mentally and seems delusional and manic. She has told us that she is seeing a psychiatrist and has new meds but all has since been proven to be untrue. She tells my father and my siblings all different stories about her treatment. Every time my poor father wants to believe her but time and time again it is not so. We are worried about this current episode as it seems far worse than others. Physically and mentally she seems to be very unwell. How can you help someone like this? We are at a loss and it seems to be she truely believes she's on the right track with treatment when in fact she isn't getting any at all. I'm so very upset for my mother as it would be horrible to live like this. My father and two younger siblings live with her and and are all struggling with day to day life that all revolves around my mum, her illness and constant lies. Does anyone know what we can do to help her? Can we force evaluations or treatments? Where do we stand? Thank you for reading and I would be so very grateful for any suggestions or advice

[white knight]

Hi Lette, welcome.

As we are people with MI we cant give advice like a professional medical petson can.

However my mother did the same. She once told me she had arthritis of the blood and had x-rays to prove it. One day later while visiting she could not provide the x-rays!

That was 1982,,35 years ago at a time when she was "not going to live long". She's 85yo now, apparently healthy but I havent seen her for 7 years, such was the damage done.

A friend of mine knew her and told me to google

Queen hermit witch waif

I then read about my mother.

You can do little. Without her consent or without her being a threat to herself or other people, there is little you can do.

Once someone loses credibility its lost forever. Make her accountable for her lies. Eg you could say "thats a bad diagnosis mum, how about I accompany you to your next Dr's appointment"?

As I said, little remedy.

Google that above for some ideas.

Tony WK

[Lette]

Thank you Tony.

wow that is my mother.

I appreciate your reply and wish you all the very best.

lette

[white knight]

Hi again

It is interesting that some illnesses cross over so we can get symptoms of other ones. We might not ever be diagnosed with the other illnesses however.

Eg I was diagnosed initially with bipolar 1 and ADHD, but eventually it was bipolar 2 and depression.

Those with BPD are very difficult to treat due to defiance as you'll read. Its also a common illness.

Google

Topic: BPD mother made me an emotional basket case- beyondblue

Tony WK