Anhedonia

[ericamaria90]

My husband and I have been separated for 10 months now, he left me just a few weeks before our first child was born. After months and months of trying to work things out with him I have just found out that he has been clinically depressed and has anhedonia. This makes so much sense to me now considering one minute we were together for 5 years, got married after 4 years and were happily (or so I thought) married for 6 months before we fell pregnant after trying to conceive and then all of a sudden he says he doesn't love me anymore and doesn't think the marriage is going to work and when I asked him at the time of our separation why and where this came from considering our baby was almost due he said he couldn't give me an answer because he just felt nothing and felt dead inside and has no feelings for anything including me. Fast forward 10 months later, I have tried and tried to reconcile with my husband but I just get nowhere. I have made steps in moving on with my life with our child but I just feel like my husband is still in there somewhere and I don't want to move on without him because I know that despite him saying he has no feelings for me anymore I know he does because the person who he currently is isn't the type of person my husband is normally.

We had a talk the other night about getting back together again and he says that he just isn't sure if it'll work because doesn't feel anything and he has no interest in me or even sex with me and he doesn't want to hurt me especially because he knows how much he has hurt me already by walking out on me. I asked if he finds me unattractive and he says that I am still beautiful in his eyes but he just doesn't want sex anymore. I told him sex isn't everything and that I am willing to try to rebuild that emotional connection with him again which is still there BUT I just don't know what I can do to do that with someone who is so closed off from their emotions and feelings. I just want some guidance as to what I can do to be there for my husband to show him I'm not giving up on him and the marriage or our little family.

Has anyone been in my position before or currently in my position. Or know someone who has dealt with someone who suffers with anhedonia? I'm at my wits end. I feel so defeated that depression has stolen my husband and robbed him and I from having the family we both planned together :((((((( please help

[1113]

Peaceful welcome ericamaria90,

Anhedonia is very common with depression.

Does you patner have any help from specialist?

I think that depression has robbedd your loves life from him.

If you look at it from that angel then its less stressful for you.

If you could reseach yourself up about his issues and support help back to health with understanding then your love for each other would only benefit in the long run.

I am happy to philosophize this with you.

If you have any cultural and religious beliefs that you feel necessary expressed please do so and this will make any further communication more suitable and comfortable. I hate offending others. Its my worst fear.

Peace to you

Matt.

[geoff]

dear Ericamaria, I did reply back to you but it hasn't appeared, so I'll wait to see if it appears. Geoff.

[Sophie_M]

Hi ericamaria90 and others, this post is a duplicate so we've locked the thread.  Please continue your conversation in the other thread here: 

My husband has anhedonia