Tried and exhaused

[Indian_dude_woof]

Hello fellow blue people,
Just wanted to get out some thoughts, jusy been extremely exhausted this past year, have graduated a year ago and I am in the same position as I was last year, I feel super tired all the time with each rejection letter, I've been having self harm thoughts, then even with that I can't commit to it, I get super scared, I guess I am just going through stuff but I just wanted those thoughts out there.

Thanks for reading stay safe

[Sophie_M]

Hey Indian_dude_woof,

You've shown a lot of strength in reaching out to our lovely community here tonight, and we are so glad that you decided to join us. We can hear that you've had a really exhausting year and we are so sorry to hear that you've been having thoughts of self-harm. We can only imagine how upsetting and disheartening it must be to receive those letters, but please know that you are not alone in this. Many in our community have also had similar feelings during difficult times in their lives, and will be able to talk through these feelings with you. This is a safe space, free of judgement for you to express your thoughts and feelings- and our community is here to help offer their support, advice and kind words through this.

We understand that it can sometimes be really tough to cope with these intense thoughts and feelings, especially if you don't feel able to open up to family or friends about these feelings. But we'd really encourage you to keep reaching out, and we think it would really help to be able to talk things through with the kind and understanding counsellors at our Beyond Blue Support Service. They are available to you 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or also through Webchat (1pm-12am AEST) at: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport Our lovely friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) and the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467) are also there for you anytime, day or night, whenever things are feeling too overwhelming to cope with.

We're all here to help you through this, and we hope that you keep us updated on how you're going whenever you feel ready.
 

[Croix]

Dear Indian_dude_woof~

I'd like to join Sophie_M in welcoming oyu here to the Support Forum, its a place where you will find many have simialr problems, and how they manage to deal with them.

Can I start with uni?You are success and to be admired. Graduation is huge.

As an educator in one for umpteen years I tend to see patterns in students, and one very common one is that so much time and effort goes into graduation they realy are exhausted, both mentally and physically. Their investment in their studies has been far more taxing than they realize.

It can often be followed by the blues, partly the feeling that can come from accomplishing your goal (I know, it sounds weird) and partly from a lack of direction and opportunity. I'll mention waht I've found has helped in a minute however I'm worried about you and the following is important.

You mood in turn can lead to trying to cope with the misery or lack of energy or motivation, not always in good ways. Some peple do harm themselves, which in the very short term can make a difference, however it is deceptively dangerous, and while you might think" I'll never let it go further, I have no desire to take my life", the problems surface. It can become a habit, the effect one time might not be enough so you damage too far, or there may be an overwhelming desire for just an instant to take one's life.

None of these things is that predictable.

Sophie's suggestions on where to get help are good ones, particularly the Suicide Call Back Service which is probably wrongly named, it deals with al sorts of things competently, with empathy and does not over-react.

Beyond Blue has sensible advice here

https://resources.beyondblue.org.au/prism/file?token=BL/1302

OK, that's out hte way, sorry to take so much time over it but I'd hate you to take the route.

What can work well for any unemployed is to divide your day, say from breakfast to lunch dealing with applications, replies, rejections -or silence (which is worse).

If you dwell on al this you end up feeling as you do now.

[Croix]

Sorry, the internet ate my reply before I had finished-sigh

I was trying to talk about you building a boundary and fencing off all the negatives that come from job applications.

The idea is once that allocated part of the day -say till lunchtime- is reached you simply stop and turn your attention and activities in completely different directions.

Find or remember what you enjoy, be it reading, movies, exercise, walking, talking with someone, art, .. well I could go on but you know you, I'm just guessing. Mine is books. I anticipate reading the next chapter, it is an excellent thing for me.

So do your household chores with something to really look forward to each day, then do them. It is not selfishness, it is self-reward, which you need and desrve, navigating such a difficult part of your life.

May I ask if you have a partner or someone else you can talk matters over with , someone who will listen and care? Trying to work by yourself is so hard. and may find parents or freinds can really help. Incidentally if you do get the urge to self-harm reach out, isolation is the worst way to go. They do not even need to know what it is about, just company.

I've run out of characters so must stop.

I would realy like it if we could talk some more (and promise to stop lecturing:)

Croix

[geoff]

Hello Indian_dude_woof, thanks for your comment and understand that this year has been an extraordinary one, no one knowing exactly what type of restrictions beholds us in the next week, making it difficult for all of us, especially those, like you, applying for a job.

Graduating last year is an enormous achievement and wanting to have a break or go on holidays after all the pressure needed to finish is what most of us would do, and once the new year begins we're hit with this unprecedented virus that virtually stops everything we're aiming for.

The frustration this causes is unimaginable and very disappointing and this can have an effect to make you experience fatigue or that horrible thought of just wanting to sleep, which is a common symptom of depression developing, which what I have experienced myself, along with many other people.

We're often told to exercise, go for a walk, play tennis or play golf, which for many does help them, but I had no strength to put the lead on my dog to even consider going for a walk, all I wanted was to sleep and even after a 'good' nights sleep 8 to 10 hours I woke up feeling exhausted.

If you feel inclined, volunteer for what interests you, but take it easy, because if you push yourself too much isn't advisable, you have to look after yourself.

Take care.

Geoff.