Suicidal idealation

[AnonymousID]

The suicidal thoughts are non stop. I have come close to death several times, which was scary but not scary enough to stop me from doing it again. I self harm because I think that's a better alternative than another attempt. I've been stuck in this pattern for as long as I can remember and don't know how to get out of it.

[Guest_4643]

Hi AnonymousID, welcome.

I'm so sorry you feel this way and deal with this. I also have suicidal thoughts, not self harm but I have attempted to do so. I haven't attempted myself, but there was this time where I was really close to trying.

I just wanted to say that you're loved and cared for, and you're worth it. I'm glad others reached out to you here. I'm glad you're still here.

I know how hard it is but it's nothing to be ashamed of. Please reach out, even to 000 if its an emergency, otherwise one of the helplines. Of course you can come here too.

Please be safe and take care.

[AnonymousID]

I was sick this morning from drinking too much and couldn't go to work. I really wish I had gone to work cause I am having a lot of trouble being left alone with my thoughts. I have Friday off as well but I might have to go to hospital then. It's just too hard

[Centaured]

AnonymousID

There is nothing wrong with getting help or going to the hospital. I hope you'll be ok.

We are here to listen if you need us.

[Sophie_M]

Dear AnonymousID, thanks for sharing. Waking up feeling sick this morning sounds quite unpleasant. It sounds like being left alone with your thoughts is getting to you. We're wondering whether some sort of distraction might be useful. You're always welcome to engage in some of our game-type threads in the BB Social Zone (see here) or anything else that may be a good distraction for you. Please remember that you are always welcome to contact our support service - they are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or from 3 pm-12 am AEST on webchat (see here). We encourage you to continue to post on these forums for support as you see fit. We hope that connecting with others on the forums brings you some comfort.   

[Guest_4643]

I'm sorry. As Centaured said, it's ok to go to hospital. It's part of life unfortunately. I hope you feel better.

[Guest_1643]

Hey AnonymousID -

if your therapist r/ship has you feeling like u have to fake it to keep them happy - it may be that the therapist conveys that expectatin to u, or simplifies things, and just isn't hearing u. im glad your getting a new MHCP

I know going to hospital sounds scary but going to hospital in my mind is a sign of being healthy - knowing you need somewhere to be safe is healthier - in the most unhealthy times I've had I was in denial and thought I could fix everything on my own. Either way you are doing what you need to do and we are here for u

[AnonymousID]

Thank you everyone. I went to the hospital today but walked out. I am going to try again tomorrow because I don't think I will make it through tomorrow being at home alone. I am having a lot of trouble getting support

[Sophie_M]

Hey AnonymousID,

You've shown so much strength in going to the hospital today, and we are glad to hear that you are going to try again tomorrow if these thoughts and feelings feel too overwhelming to cope with. You're taking some really big, and important steps to help yourself keep safe and get the support that you need and deserve through this. We'd also really encourage you to reach out to our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) and Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467) for some extra support tonight to help you through this. The kind and understanding counsellors are there to help you anytime, 24/7, during overwhelming times like this. You never have to go through this alone.

Our Support Service are also currently getting in touch with you through email to check in with you, and can help talk through some supports to help you through this difficult time.

If you feel that you may be in immediate risk of harm, it's really important that you do contact 000 (triple zero), or you can also go to the hospital again yourself if you feel like you are able to stay safe to make the journey. In this situation, a medical professional team will be able to talk through potential next steps, and assess the levels of risk to your safety. Another option might be to get in touch with your local crisis assessment and treatment team for advice.

We hope you can find some comfort in the caring and supportive words from the community- we're all here to help you through this.

 

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Anonymous ID,

I think you are so brave to have gone to the hospital today...that’s okay that you walked away...you’re frightened and that’s okay too....Tomorrow is another day....and you said you will try again...I am very proud of you..

Anonymous,...The Drs. and nurses are really very caring and only want the best for you..I spent nearly 6 weeks in a mh ward...and the care they showed me was so good. I was scared and wanted to run away...but I also knew I didn’t want to be unwell any more...I got good help and came away with more knowledge how to manage my mh....

Please try very hard to put your faith into your therapist, or the Drs at the hospital...it’s hard to open up to them...but it’s really 100x harder not to...Faking your wellness is only making you you go deeper into depression..and I know that you don’t want that to happen...because you’ve reached out for help...and neither do we..

I hope tonight you manage to get some sleep...maybe when you lay down..put a you tube sleep story on, close your eyes and listen to gentle words as it takes you on a calming adventure....Hopefully you will drift of into peaceful sleep...

My kindest and most caring thoughts dear Anonymous..

Grandy..

[Guest_1643]

Hello Anonymous ID

I know you were worried about tomorrow because you are not @ work

I think it's great you went to the hopsital without going in - that was what you were up for today. It's hard to get through those doors. So impressed you gave it a go.
Stay strong and we are here for u