Newbie Not Coping Well

[BlondeChick]

Hi y’all! I’m new here and I don’t know how this goes but someone has told me this service might help…

So what’s going on? Im struggling to keep my mental health at this moment… Im having the urge to end my life right now… the plan and the things to use are laid out in front of me… I somehow started to write the note to my family once I’ve done it. Got all things sorted for my family to have when I’m gone.. i have very little community support which in the past was enough but I don’t know about today if it is enough… I feel lonely hopeless and worthless right now

[smallwolf]

Hello.

I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling with your mental health right now and feeling such intense pain and hopelessness. It takes a lot of courage to open up about these difficult thoughts and emotions, and I want you to know that others here have had these feelings. Your life is valuable and important, and there is help and support available to you.

It sounds like you do not have much support, but my hope would be that you  reach out to someone or a mental health professional, or a crisis hotline for support. You don't have to go through this alone. Beyond blue also has a safety planning app you could look at as well. 

Do you want to talk about anything? 

[David35]

Feelings can be very tricky to process. Just because you may feel worthless, doesn't make it true. What particular reasons do you have for feeling this way?

[therising]

Hi BlondeChick

I feel for you so deeply as you face some of the most challenging emotions a person can face. I'm so glad you've come here so as not to face them alone.

As David35 mentions, feelings can be tricky to process. Over time I've come to realise there are so many different feelings/emotions, some obvious and some not so obvious

• Self grief: The overwhelming feeling of having lost a sense of self (aka 'I just don't know who I am anymore'). Can become incredibly sorrowful. Can be about the push for greater self understanding while also being about letting go and bringing new parts of our self to life
  
• Completely lost: The feeling of no sense of direction, being in the dark/not having light and a guide. With this comes the overwhelming push to find enlightenment and guidance
• Disintegration: The push to identify the integration of you, everything that's created who you are, everything that preceded the dis-integration. Being on the verge of major change can sound like 'I just can't live with my (false sense of) self anymore'. It's the verge of coming to know who you naturally are
• Waking up: While waking up can feel amazing, it can also feel depressing. On one hand you can suddenly wake up to your ability to feel what your body's telling you about a situation or person, through emotion (aka a specific energy in motion you can sense/feel in your body). On the other hand, becoming so sensitive means 'heartbreak' can be easily felt/identified. With this comes the push to better define and manage the more telling emotions 

The list goes on. All emotions have a push factor.

Personally, I'm a gal who's a major feeler. This definitely comes with challenges. Would you say you're a feeler?