Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

Pinned discussions

Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Sorted by:

Start a discussion

Finally I have broken

replies: 2

I am 41 yo dad of 3 I get along great with my wife who has mental health issues of her own I am usually the strong one in the family but I have broken down had a nervous breakdown get constant panic attacks yesterday I heard noises in my head saying life is too hard everything is on your shoulders just end it right here the only thing that has stoped me is my children and my wife otherwise I think I would of attempted to go ahead with it I have Been suffering from this s long time but I cannot hide it anymore because it is getting worse

3 hospital visits

replies: 5

I feel so broken. My heart is broke In half, my brain is a fog and my body feels like it has the flu. This is all mental illness. im on 24-7 suicide watch I have a psychiatrist nurse visit daily i have a doctor visit daily i have a social worker check up on me. i have a new psychiatrist coming to my house tomorrow and and appointment with my one in two weeks. no one wants to touch my medication incase I get worse. Plus I don’t think I can handle the side effects. I tried to kill my self twice in one week but failed. the hospital let me out as I have sufficient care. None of my family are talking to me as I’m a mistake and the crazy v person in the family no one loves. i feel so close to ending it. I find know how I’m going to beat this.

Suicidal

replies: 13

Firstly I think mods do thei best. Secondly I feel complete ut of touch with reality. I want people to post freely and express it.

DEPRESSION IS COMPLICATED

replies: 6

Depression is only one word but it has so many meanings for different people. One thing I'm sure of after all this time, is that depression is an insidious disease. You often can't see it just by looking at a person, and it's even harder to explain. In the past year I have tried to be more open about my personal struglle. The most challenging thing for me is when people say, "but you look fine". It makes me feel so frustrated.

Trigger warning. Just venting

replies: 5

I’m sorry but I’m really tired and exhausted with my mental health. I feel like society doesn’t accept men that can go through a mental health issue. I’ve been down for so many years and the only thing keeping me alive is my son who has autism and needs me to make it in life. I don’t have anyone to support me, my wife and I fight over the smallest of things so why would I say how I truely feel? My friends, family, colleagues are all not there for me. I put on a brave face and have even convinced health professionals I’m ok but deep down I’m not. I’m just really down and want this to end. I’m not posting this for recognition or help, I just want to get this off my chest. I think we as society need to take mental health more seriously and our government need to pay more attention than this strategy to just refer to community health and hope the problem goes away by putting their head in the sand. If you’re like I was 12 months ago, please reach out to somone privately, the public system fails at so many points. If you feel like me now and have connections please be honest with how you feel. I’m just tired and exhausted but hopefully tomorrow I wake up and just get on with life which is what every one expects. Take care

So where do I go from here

replies: 9

Long time lurkier here, done a few threads but they usually are deemed not helpful and get canned. I'm alive only because the wonderful woman I married wants me to be, there is nothing else at all that gives me any reason to stay but for her I have endured and fort, but I'm tired, I don't want to hold on, fight, endure or do any of the other 100 catch frazes that people spout thinking there helping I just want nothing, nothing at all, surely that isn't too much to ask, nothing at all, to just slip away and never have to feel the misery and loathing ever again. I've tried to hold it together, I've been on so many medications over the 40+ years I lived with this, been admitted to the mental health ward, lets think, at least 5 times were my stay was greater than 3 weeks which is also when I was given the 4 courses of ECT, voluntarily, I will give any treatment a fair try in hope I might find some relief but nothing ever really helps, I'm just finishing the 4th Couse of ECT along with yet another med change so everything has changed except for the misery, it's just as strong, crippling and smothering, only difference now is ECT has wiped out so much memory that the wonderful woman I stay for is under more strain than ever because she has to keep telling me all the things I can't remember, I so wish she could see I'm just a lead weight around her neck as we sail full steam on the SS Titanic. I have other friends cursed by this same mongrel Blackdog and their wives deserted them, separated quick smart, Oh how I wish my sweet wife would also, we don't have to sell up like the others did to settle 50/50, I don't want or need anything, it's all her's with my blessing and the hope she finds someone loving and not damaged, someone to love and treat her special. but that seems unlikely because even as damaged as I am, she thinks I'm special 37 years married, 37 years of my depression and she still thinks I'm special, and if I sneak off and do what I so want to I know it will destroy her. How silly is this, I know I could make it look like an accident, She would never know, that should be enough but still I cant bring myself to do it as I still see in my minds eye what it will do to her, I truly love her with all my heart but I wish for both of us we had never met. anyone out there have any magic solution because I sure could use a way out of this nightmare

TW SH Venting

replies: 4

I recently posted on a different forum seeking advice for something else but after everything running through my head today I think I’ve had a few realisations. I think I might be suicidal. I lied to myself and my parents and my psychologist saying that I don’t want to kill myself. It isn’t exactly a lie, because I don’t, there’s so much I want to live for, but everything just seems so out of reach, unattainable. I’ve harmed myself before while on meds that just didn’t agree with me, and now that I’m not on any, the thoughts are ten times worse and near constant. The main difference is right now I can stop myself from acting on them whereas while on those meds it’s like I gave up control. The thoughts are always there though. Thinking about how I could do it. It scares me sometimes how often they’re there and that I’ve almost become used to it. Thinking about it now makes me feel sick. I don’t know what would help but I’m doing some more research. I’m going to get help, but I just wanted to talk about it here before trying to talk to the psychologist. I always struggle to get words out so maybe writing it here will make it easier.

Poor Mental Health... Again.

replies: 6

Living with this condition is terrible. I'm only 24. I feel like I was born with it, and that it is slowly getting worse as time goes on. I am experiencing severe side effects from the medication that I am taking, and absolutely nobody will listen to my concerns in regards to this. I clearly have no purpose here - so ending my life could be an option, although I don't want to do it. No one wants to be friends with me/be my boyfriend either because I am not NT. And before people ask, yes, I am seeking help for my Schizophrenia - from an excellent psychiatrist and psychotherapist. But unfortunately, my psychiatrist is moving on to a different mental health centre at some point in the near future and I am going to struggle again. I am hoping to seek psychological assistance from the head psychiatrist of the state, at my local mental health centre - boy aren't I lucky? On top of that, my mother is a perfectionist and my father has no understanding of mental health - even though they both suffer from it. I am often at fault for a lot of things - such as my parents drinking and gambling problems. I've also been reminded consistently that I need to move out of home so that I am basically not a nuisance to my parents anymore. I have been having nightmares about my mother and I arguing. I have self-harmed. I was bullied in school about my hair. I've been groomed and I had another man lead me on, making me believe that he had he liked me for me when really, he is a narcissist who has a ex-wife and daughter on the side. I have tried to be a bit more extroverted, to no avail. I am sick of being rejected. I also tried receiving closure about something from a psychic medium. She turned out to be a charlatan, and she ripped off a family member of mine, taking her money as well. I have had a gutful.

Mens emotions, sledging, bullying and toughening up

replies: 8

Society is broken. Here we are well into the 21st century and after more than 4 decades of effort by many including this organisation and we still have elements of our communities that hold the view that men should "harden up". I like AFL footy. Last night there was an incident that, from what we are told, was a sledge on the field by the Brisbane captain to a Melbourne player. So bad was the words that the victim was uncontrollably emotional, crying and red faced. At the end of the game the Brisbane abuser appeared to apologise and it seemed half accepted. An investigation will commence. Today the topic appeared on Facebook. The comments were appalling. -"you're among men now, you're not playing under 12's, harden up"- "you got the age wrong, more like you're not in the sandpit"- "Harden up. Afl isn't for you lad. You wouldn't have lasted in the 80s or 90s" So, if you cry you shouldn't play footy. If you cry you are immature so, you shouldn't play with the real men. If you cry you should harden up. How do you harden up? Besides, why should you harden up? So I did reply in that I mentioned the men suicide total for 2020 was 2384 and the road toll for males and females was 1094... less than half. Sadly we cannot change the way people think. Society, is a large slow machine that takes evolution to bring about change. TonyWK

Should i tell my therapist that I want to kill myself

replies: 8

Hi everybody, I am a 19 year old male who still lives at home with family. I am wondering what would happen if I were to tell my psychologist that I feel suicidal sometimes. I really don't want my family to know this about me. Any response is greatly appreciated. by the way, I am not in any immediate danger of committing suicide, and I highly doubt that i ever would. But every now and then I think about it quite deeply.

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

Finally I have broken replies: 2

3 hospital visits replies: 5

Suicidal replies: 13

DEPRESSION IS COMPLICATED replies: 6

Trigger warning. Just venting replies: 5

So where do I go from here replies: 9

TW SH Venting replies: 4

Poor Mental Health... Again. replies: 6

Mens emotions, sledging, bullying and toughening up replies: 8

Should i tell my therapist that I want to kill myself replies: 8